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NOTEFULL Some people say that computers have made life easier and more convenient. Other people say that computers have made life more complex and stressful. What is your opinion? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.1

NOTEFULL Some people say that computers have made life easier and more convenient. Other people say that computers have made life more complex and stressful. What is your opinion? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 1
In the modern era of cut throat competition, everyone is working hard to earn their bread and livelihood. While performing their duties whole heartedly and with utmost dedication, people is leaving their work relationships behind. However, it is argued by the large number of people that to befriend with colleagues is not important and one should focus on their respective duties. This essay will discuss why I totally disagree with this opinion and how productivity can be improved with a healthy environment in the organisation. Firstly, having a decent environment in the organisation help in increasing work productivity. Huge targets can be achieved if there is a healthy relationship among the employees. Good interpersonal relations help in improving teamwork and those having a good bond tend to collaborate on the project more effectively. For example, it is rightly said, "Alone we can do little, together we can do so much". Also, organisations should arrange team activities and sports day once in a while so that employees get connected to each other outside work environment. This will help them in achieving their targets more effectively and efficiently. Secondly, employees at senior level spend most of their time at their workstations, so it is important having sound and friendly environment around them. Every challenge and target need to be discussed with all employees, so that they should work as a family in achieving the organisational objective. The personal objective should also be given importance by the organisation in order to help employees in improving and upgrading themselves. Besides this, annual appraisal should be done on the basis of work done, targets achieved and good interpersonal relations with other counter employees. Thirdly, it is important to have healthy competition among the employees of the company. I am of the opinion that some preference should be given to that employee who maintain good relations with all in addition to his/her work objectives. Some can be awarded with monetary benefits, who is always ready to take extra responsibilities and are ready to help anyone in trouble. Employees need to be motivated by conducting office parties and other social gatherings, to give employees opportunity to know each other. For example, some companies conduct a welcome party for the new employee so that he can adapt to the new environment easily and work effectively. To sum up, we discussed in this essay that it is important to have good relations at your working place. This results in improving teamwork and it is good for the personal lives of the employees. I am of the opinion that as we are social creatures, maintaining good social networks around is vital for our mind and soul.
In the modern era of
'cut throat' seems to be a compound adjective in front of a noun. Use a hyphen: "cut-throat".
cut throat
competition, everyone is working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to earn their bread and livelihood. While performing their duties whole
heartedly
and with utmost dedication,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
leaving their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
relationships behind.
However
, it
is argued
by the large number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that to befriend with colleagues is not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
and one should focus on their respective duties. This essay will discuss why I
totally
disagree with this opinion and how productivity can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
with a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
in the
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
.

Firstly
, having a decent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
in the
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
productivity. Huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
targets
can
be achieved
if there is a healthy relationship among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Good
interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relations
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in improving teamwork and those having a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
bond tend to collaborate on the project more
effectively
.
For example
, it is
rightly
said,
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Alone we can do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
, together we can do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
.
Also
,
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
should arrange team activities and sports day once in a while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
connected to each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
outside
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
. This will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them in achieving their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
targets
more
effectively
and
efficiently
.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
at senior level spend most of their time at their workstations,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
having sound and friendly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
around them. Every challenge and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
target
need to
be discussed
with all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as a family in achieving the
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisational' is British English.
organisational
objective. The personal objective should
also
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
importance by the
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
in order to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
in improving and upgrading themselves.
Besides
this, annual appraisal should
be done
on the basis of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
done,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
targets
achieved and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relations
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
counter employees.

Thirdly
, it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
to have healthy competition among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
. I am of the opinion that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
preference should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
who maintain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relations
with all
in addition
to his/her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
objectives.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
can
be awarded
with monetary benefits, who is always ready to take extra responsibilities and are ready to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
anyone in trouble.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Employees
need to
be motivated
by conducting office parties and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
social gatherings, to give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
opportunity to know each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
conduct a welcome party for the new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that he can adapt to the new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
easily
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
effectively
.

To sum up, we discussed in this essay that it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
to have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relations
at your working place. This results in improving teamwork and it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
for the personal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
. I am of the opinion that as we are social creatures, maintaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
social networks around is vital for our mind and soul.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
With languages, you are at home anywhere.
Edward De Waal

IELTS essay NOTEFULL Some people say that computers have made life easier and more convenient. Other people say that computers have made life more complex and stressful. What is your opinion? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
446 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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