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Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisement tell us about new product that may improve our lives. Which view do you agree or disagree? v.32

Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisement tell us about new product that may improve our lives. Which view v. 32
Advertisements have become an inevitable part in the modern society. Some sections of individuals think that the promotion of business in various media inspires people to buy those products, while others think that it can help increase the quality of the life by educating people about the recent innovations and latest products in the market. This essay will discuss both these views and argue why the advertisements can be a motivation for people, to spend on items that they do not want. Even though the commercials are one of the ways to educate the masses about a new product or innovation, there are other better ways for the company to adopt. For instance, there are various blog catering to different industries, wherein passionate people can get to know the specifications of the latest products. Additionally, by advertisements, the sole intention of the company is to drive sales of its products. For example, it is widely known that the television ad campaigns are an effective way for the corporations to increase their revenue and not to increase consciousness among people. In comparison, because of the pure marketing brilliance, it instills a sense of desire in its viewers, who in turn would spend their hard earned money on it. One clear such example is that everywhere, the sales of products not advertised will be lower than any other comparable products, which has been promoted in the market. Further, commercials can bring about recognition of the product among the people and repeated viewing can instil a feeling, to try out the products. To illustrate, it has been shown in a recent study that people would opt for brands they know rather than any other new product. To conclude, I believe that the commercials can motivate the commoners to buy products that they do not want. Hence, they serve the purposes of the companies to drive growth and not for informing people about new innovations and product launches in the market.
Advertisements have become an inevitable part in the modern society.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
sections of individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the promotion of business in various media inspires
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, while others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
increase the quality of the life by educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about the recent innovations and latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
in the market. This essay will discuss both these views and argue why the advertisements can be a motivation for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, to spend on items that they do not want.

Even though
the commercials are one of the ways to educate the masses about a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
or innovation, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
better ways for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
to adopt.
For instance
, there are various blog catering to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
industries, wherein passionate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know the specifications of the latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
Additionally
, by advertisements, the sole intention of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
is to drive sales of its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
For example
, it is
widely
known that the television ad campaigns are an effective way for the corporations to increase their revenue and not to increase consciousness among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

In comparison
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the pure marketing brilliance, it instills a sense of desire in its viewers, who in turn would spend their
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
hard earned
money on it. One
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
such example is that everywhere, the sales of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
not advertised will be lower than any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
comparable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, which has
been promoted
in the market.
Further
, commercials can bring about recognition of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and repeated viewing can
Possible spelling mistake. 'instil' is British English.
instil
a feeling, to try out the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. To illustrate, it has
been shown
in a recent study that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would opt for brands they know
rather
than any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
new product.

To conclude
, I believe that the commercials can motivate the commoners to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that they do not want.
Hence
, they serve the purposes of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
to drive growth and not for informing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about new innovations and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
launches in the market.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisement tell us about new product that may improve our lives. Which view v. 32

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
327 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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