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Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. v.24

Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. v. 24
In a modern era, Advertisement plays a vital role to promote any product. Few people have a belief that promoting a product via advertisement excites the customers, which cause them to unnecessarily buying those items. Also, others told that it helps consumers to know the features of products which makes life easier for them. In my opinion, I strongly agree that advertisements suggest users about their new item. I will illustrate with probable reasons to elaborate further. Firstly, customers got to know the itinerary of the product. It is really needed for them to find the pros and cons of the item. Consequently, they can able to select a product which suits them. For instance, they can cross check the ratings and reviews on each item though online promotions which helps them to identify and compare multiple brands of product. Moreover, they have an option to give a feedback about the product. However, many companies are misusing the advertisement ideology. They are making false promotions to cheat the customers to buy their products. In addition, they are continuously promoting ads which irritates the users. Especially, they are kept on sending text messages though phones and posts on social networking sites. Furthermore, they attract users with great deals such as discounts, offers etc. In promotions which are not available for purchase. In conclusion, I would like to say that in spite of disadvantages, we have more advantages to advertise a new product. Nowadays, we have a bunch of verities on each product which have many features. So, customers have to look the advertisements before purchase.
In a modern era,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Advertisement
plays a vital role to promote any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
. Few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have a belief that promoting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
via
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
excites the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
, which cause them to
unnecessarily
buying those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
.
Also
, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
that it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
consumers to know the features of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
life easier for them. In my opinion, I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
suggest users about their new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
item
. I will illustrate with probable reasons to elaborate
further
.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
to know the itinerary of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
. It is
really
needed for them to find the pros and cons of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
item
.
Consequently
, they
Please check whether one of these words is redundant.
can able to
select a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
which suits them.
For instance
, they can cross
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
the ratings and reviews on each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
item
though online promotions which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to identify and compare multiple brands of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
.
Moreover
, they have an option to give a feedback about the product.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
are misusing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
ideology. They are making false promotions to cheat the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
In addition
, they are
continuously
promoting ads which irritates the users.
Especially
, they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
on sending text messages though phones and posts on social networking sites.
Furthermore
, they attract users with great deals such as discounts, offers etc. In promotions which are not available for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
.

In conclusion
, I would like to say that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
in spite of
disadvantages, we have more advantages to advertise a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
. Nowadays, we have a bunch of verities on each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
which have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
features.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
look the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. v. 24

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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