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Some people prefer to spend their free time outdoors. Other people prefer to spend their leisure time indoors. Would you prefer to be outside or would you prefer to be inside for your leisure activities? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your c v.1

Some people prefer to spend their free time outdoors. Other people prefer to spend their leisure time indoors. Would you prefer to be outside or would you prefer to be inside for your leisure activities? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your c v. 1
A topic like really high incomes, which was always debatable, has now become more controversial. It sparked the controversy in recent years as many people has different opinions and some agree with high salaries, while others think that these incomes are not justified in any way. This essay will discuss the both sides of the coin and reach to a fair conclusion based on facts and arguments. At the outset, there are numerous reasons why people think that the government should be involved in setting a limit on how much money an employee can earn, however the most conspicuous lies in the fact that there should be a balance between salaries and not a big gap, as most of the CEOs or politicians have unjustified salaries. As an example, in Romania politicians have incomes of millions of dollars, while the minimum economy salary is of a couple of hundred dollars and people can barely survive with what they earn. Also, the social gap is very high and the middle class earnings have disappeared completely in the last decade, therefore there are just rich and poor people. Are high salaries good for a country's economic development? Some people think that this is a way of measuring how well developed a country is and that no one should interfere with how much money someone can earn. If the employee is worth enough money to have a well-paid salary this should not represent an issue for anyone. For instance, some companies have a shortage of skilled workers and they have to find employees overseas and offer them good salary packages and relocation offers as well. In this way the company and the country will benefit in the long term; as the economy might bloom and also the company can have innovative products. From what has been discussed above, it can be concluded that justified high salaries should not be a problem, however the government should intervene and reduce the extremely incomes which are earned without any justification.
A topic like
really
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
incomes
, which was always debatable, has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
become more controversial. It sparked the controversy in recent years as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
opinions and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
, while others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
incomes
are not justified in any way.

This essay will discuss the both sides of the coin and reach to a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
conclusion based on facts and arguments.

At the outset, there are numerous reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
be involved
in setting a limit on how much money an employee can earn,
however
the most conspicuous lies in the fact that there should be a balance between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
and not a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
gap, as most of the CEOs or politicians have unjustified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
. As an example, in Romania politicians have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
incomes
of millions of dollars, while the minimum economy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
is of a couple of hundred dollars and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
barely
survive with what they earn.
Also
, the social gap is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
and the middle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
earnings have disappeared completely in the last decade,
therefore
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
rich and poor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for a country's economic development?

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that this is a way of measuring how
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well developed
a country is and that no one should interfere with how much money someone can earn. If the employee is worth
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
money to have a well-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
this should not represent an issue for anyone.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
have a shortage of skilled
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
workers and
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
find employees overseas and offer them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
packages and relocation offers
as well
. In this way the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
and the country will benefit in the long term; as the economy might bloom and
also
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
can have innovative products.

From what has
been discussed
above, it can
be concluded
that justified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
should not be a problem,
however
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should intervene and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
extremely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
incomes
which
are earned
without any justification.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people prefer to spend their free time outdoors. Other people prefer to spend their leisure time indoors. Would you prefer to be outside or would you prefer to be inside for your leisure activities? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your c v. 1

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
334 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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