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Some people have benefited from modern communications technology, but some people have not benefited from it at all. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people have benefited from modern communications technology, but some people have not benefited from it at all. v. 1
Many people believe in using alternative medicines to treat their illnesses. Traditional forms of medicine have been around for centuries and include the use of herbs, elements, oils, and even energy transference. It is vital to assess the utility of such treatments in a modern world of medicine for the benefit of patients. Although some individuals ascertain that alternative medicine is a negative, this is completely inaccurate because alternative medicine is extremely inexpensive and effective intervention for most ailments. Many forms of alternative medicines are quite affordable for the general public and can be easily accessed. In many cases, traditional remedies can be bought for just a few dollars, or even produced in a person's garden, as where modern pharmaceuticals may cost ten times as much to cure the same illness. For instance, antibiotics used to treat bacterial infections can cost a hundred dollars for just a few pills, however, natural antibiotics like parsley and garlic, cost just a few cents. In addition, these herbs can be bought at nearby grocery stores and produce retailers without having to get prescriptions to exchange at a pharmacy. Not only is cost-efficiency one benefit of using alternative medicines, but also, they are truly effective. Most importantly, traditional medicines often target the root of medical problems, as opposed to just the symptoms, and have positive long-lasting results. The use of many ancient therapies and natural herbs is concerned with strengthening the human body, specifically the afflicted individual's immune system, rather than just attacking the pathogens which cause the sickness. The same garlic and parsley used to treat a bacterial infection, not only helps to cleanse the body, but also boosts the immune system, so that the person's natural defences can restore health. In conclusion, the notion that traditional medicines are invaluable is completely absurd, as they are often less expensive and more effective. Therefore, alternative medicine is absolutely a worthwhile approach to healing. In the end, it is foolish to think that our ancestors did not know what they were doing.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe in using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternative
medicines to treat their illnesses.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Traditional
forms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medicine
have been around for centuries and include the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of herbs, elements, oils, and even energy transference. It is vital to assess the utility of such treatments in a modern world of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medicine
for the benefit of patients. Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals ascertain that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medicine
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
, this is completely inaccurate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medicine
is
extremely
inexpensive and effective intervention for most ailments.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
forms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternative
medicines are quite affordable for the
Consider using "public".
general public
and can be
easily
accessed. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cases,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
remedies can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a few dollars, or even produced in a person's garden, as where modern pharmaceuticals may cost ten times as much to cure the same illness.
For instance
, antibiotics
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to treat bacterial infections can cost a hundred dollars for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a few pills,
however
, natural antibiotics like parsley and garlic, cost
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a few cents.
In addition
, these herbs can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
at nearby grocery stores and produce retailers without having to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
prescriptions to exchange at a pharmacy. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
is cost
-efficiency one benefit of using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternative
medicines,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
, they are
truly
effective.

Most
importantly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
medicines
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
target the root of medical problems, as opposed to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
the symptoms, and have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
long-lasting results. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ancient therapies and natural herbs
is concerned
with strengthening the human body,
specifically
the afflicted individual's immune system,
rather
than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
attacking the pathogens which cause the sickness. The same garlic and parsley
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to treat a bacterial infection, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to cleanse the body,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
boosts the immune system,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the person's natural
Possible spelling mistake. 'defences' is British English.
defences
can restore health.

In conclusion
, the notion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
medicines are invaluable is completely absurd, as they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
less expensive and more effective.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medicine
is
absolutely
a worthwhile approach to healing. In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, it is foolish to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that our ancestors did not know what they were doing.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people have benefited from modern communications technology, but some people have not benefited from it at all. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
337 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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