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some people feel that boarding schools (where students or pupils live at the school during the term) are an excellent option for children, while other people disagree for a number of reasons. Consider both sides of this debate and reach a conclusion. v.2

some people feel that boarding schools (where students or pupils live at the school during the term) are an excellent option for children, while other people disagree for a number of reasons. Consider both sides of this debate and reach a conclusion. v. 2
We are provided with the statement, Students staying in schools during the working days is a better option, meanwhile some feel that it is not the right thing for students. In the following essay, I would argue on both the views and could raise up a conclusion. Schools today has become globalised, As the number of international students getting to each university getting increased year by year. It becomes a prime reason behind schools coming up with boarding options to attract global youth. On one hand, It might be helpful for students, As it could become their home away with their beloved people as well as in cost wise it would be a great choice for students as most of the dorms charge a minimal amount of their students. It reduces the burden for international students in search of houses to stay as its hard to find in a new region with strangers all around. Some feel that safety in these dorms is arguable, because even a small talk between students could end up in quarrels and may become life threat to them. Looking into the number of racist attacks on the Students all over the world getting higher and higher, students opting for private housing or other options could be the prime choice. Not only private housing is safe, but provides them with their own mind space to explore. On a concluding note, I believe that it's all on the personal note, If one feels comfortable with the dorms, they should go with that or considered the other options. Safety is prime for every student, Yet It is the institution's responsibility too to put up with strict rules and regulations before coming up with stay option rather to pave way for illegal activities.
We
are provided
with the statement,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
staying in schools during the working days is a better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
option
, meanwhile
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
feel that it is not the right thing for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. In the following essay, I would argue on both the views and could raise up a conclusion.

Schools
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalised' is British English.
globalised
, As the number of international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
getting to each university getting increased year by year. It
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
becomes
a prime reason behind schools coming up with boarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
options
to attract global youth. On one hand, It might be helpful for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, As it could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
their home away with their beloved
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
as well
as in cost wise it would be a great choice for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
as most of the dorms charge a minimal amount of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
the burden for international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in search of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
to stay as
Did you mean "it's" (="it is") instead of 'its' (possessive pronoun)?
its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to find in a new region with strangers all around.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
feel that safety in these dorms is arguable,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
even a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
talk between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up in quarrels and may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
become
life threat to them. Looking into the number of racist attacks on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
all over the world getting higher and higher,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
opting for private housing or other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
options
could be the prime choice. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
private housing is safe,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
provides them with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
mind space to explore.

On a concluding note, I believe that it's all on the personal note, If one feels comfortable with the dorms, they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
go with
that or considered the other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
options
. Safety is prime for every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
,
Yet
It is the institution's responsibility too to put up with strict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
coming up with stay
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
option
rather
to pave way for illegal activities.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay some people feel that boarding schools (where students or pupils live at the school during the term) are an excellent option for children, while other people disagree for a number of reasons. Consider both sides of this debate and reach a conclusion. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
294 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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