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some people feel learning one or two languages is enough. while others feel one must learn lot of languages. v.1

some people feel learning one or two languages is enough. while others feel one must learn lot of languages. v. 1
It is believed that raising the minimum driving age is the most effective method to improve road safety. While I accept that this approach has some effects in the short term, I believe that a long-term and a better solution is to impose stricter punishments for driving offences. I think that increasing the minimum legal driving age can help reduce traffic accidents, thus improving the safety of roads. This is because a large number of traffic incidents are caused by young people’s careless driving. Many of them are not mature enough to fully understand the serious consequences of their actions or to be responsible for what they caused. Raising the driving age, therefore, can make sure that the youngest drivers are mature enough to take driving seriously and to protect their own lives and other people’s lives when driving. In my opinion, however, this approach is only effective to a limited extent, due to the fact that nowadays many youngsters still drive without a driving licence. So, a more effective way to ensure road traffic safety is to impose more severe punishments on those who commit driving offences. For example, a longer prison sentence could be given for very serious offences and a heavier fine could be imposed for running a red light or driving without a helmet. These punishments could help deter potential offenders and prevent people from re-offending. In conclusion, I believe that introducing stricter regulations for driving offences is a much better measure to increase road safety in comparison with increasing the minimum driving age.
It
is believed
that raising the minimum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
is the most effective method to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
. While I accept that this approach has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
effects in the short term, I believe that a long-term and a better solution is to impose stricter punishments for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
Possible spelling mistake. 'offences' is British English.
offences
.

I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that increasing the minimum legal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
traffic accidents,
thus
improving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
traffic incidents
are caused
by young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s careless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
of them are not mature
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to
fully
understand the serious consequences of their actions or to be responsible for what they caused. Raising the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
,
therefore
, can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure that the youngest drivers are mature
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
seriously
and to protect their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
and other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
when driving.

In my opinion,
however
, this approach is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
effective to a limited extent, due to the fact that nowadays
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
youngsters
still
drive without a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
Possible spelling mistake. 'licence' is British English.
licence
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, a more effective way to ensure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
is to impose more severe punishments on those who commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
Possible spelling mistake. 'offences' is British English.
offences
.
For example
, a longer prison sentence could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
serious
Possible spelling mistake. 'offences' is British English.
offences
and a heavier fine could
be imposed
for running a red light or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
without a helmet. These punishments could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
deter potential offenders and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from re-offending.

In conclusion
, I believe that introducing stricter regulations for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
Possible spelling mistake. 'offences' is British English.
offences
is a much better measure to increase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
in comparison
with increasing the minimum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay some people feel learning one or two languages is enough. while others feel one must learn lot of languages. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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