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Some people consider price as the most important thing to think about when buying products (such as cell phone) or service (e. g. medical treatment. ) Do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people consider price as the most important thing to think about when buying products (such as cell phone) or service (e. g. medical treatment. ) v. 1
It is thought by some that price is the most important factor to consider while making purchase of products and services such as a cell phone or a medical treatment respectively. In my opinion, I feel whether the price is to be regarded as the most important thing or not, depends on the purpose of the facility we want to buy. Firstly, price certainly plays a crucial role as a factor to consider, when buying a material product such as a cell phone, which are bought to make calls. This is mainly because, with an increase in price, its features increases. A cheap cell phone, for instance, comes with a low-quality pixel-camera, while the camera quality improves with a high-end mobile phone costing more. So, the price has to be taken into account while purchasing material products. Another reason why price ought to be considered as the most crucial aspect while buying a product is simply to avoid over-spending on a less worthy product. In other words, prices for most manufactured products are not fixed and the same product can be bought in/at a cheaper price if bargained, therefore, help saving money. This, moreover, prevents victimization of the customer by fraudulent sellers, who wants to sell the product at an expensive rate. On the other hand, when purchasing a service, such as a medical treatment, which could impact health directly, price is certainly not the priority. The reason for this is that life cannot be put at stake for the prices of the services, and cheaper medical procedures are, unfortunately, less likely to achieve the best result. In such cases, the quality of the service or product should replace its price as the top priority. To conclude, although price can be negotiated when considering purchase of material products which have no direct effect on health, services affecting life should not be calculated and matched with their costs.
It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
factor to consider while making
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
such as a cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
or a medical treatment
respectively
. In my opinion, I feel whether the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
is to
be regarded
as the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
thing or not, depends on the purpose of the facility we want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
certainly
plays a crucial role as a factor to consider, when buying a material
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
such as a cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
, which are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
calls. This is
mainly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, with an increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
, its features increases. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
,
for instance
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
with a low-quality pixel-camera, while the camera quality
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
with a high-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
costing more.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be taken
into account while purchasing material products.

Another reason why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
ought to
be considered
as the most crucial aspect while buying a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
is
simply
to avoid over-spending on a less worthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
.
In other words
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
for most manufactured
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
and the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
in/at a cheaper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
if bargained,
therefore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
The verb 'help' is used with an infinitive: "to save" or "save".
saving
money. This,
moreover
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevents
victimization of the customer by fraudulent sellers, who wants to sell the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
at an expensive rate.

On the other hand
, when purchasing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
, such as a medical treatment, which could impact health
directly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
is
certainly
not the priority.
The reason for this is
that life cannot
be put
at stake for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
, and cheaper medical procedures are, unfortunately, less likely to achieve the best result. In such cases, the quality of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
should replace its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
as the top priority.

To conclude
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
can
be negotiated
when considering
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
of material
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
which have no direct effect on health,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
affecting life should not
be calculated
and matched with their costs.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people consider price as the most important thing to think about when buying products (such as cell phone) or service (e. g. medical treatment. ) v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
317 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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