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Some people claim that museums and art galleries are not needed today, because everyone can see historical objects or art works by computer. Do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people claim that museums and art galleries are not needed today, because everyone can see historical objects or art works by computer. v. 1
It is true that technology gives most people a chance to see historical objects and works of art on a computer screen. I partly agree with the view, therefore, that museums and art that galleries are no longer necessary. It is very expensive to maintain a museum or art gallery, and governments often have to provide funding for these institutions. If national or local authorities have to allocate resources to keep these cultural facilities open, then less money is available to spend on health, education and social services. Faced with such a choice, some countries opt for a mixed funding model for the arts in order to reduce costs. Therefore, I believe that it is an unaffordable luxury to retain these wonderful public collections. Their artifacts and paintings can all be accessed freely and almost instantly at the touch of a key on a computer keyboard. While I agree that museums and art galleries are not essential in this computer age, I would be sad to see their disappearance. Firstly, the buildings which house their collections are themselves part of our tangible cultural heritage. For example, the National Gallery in London is a striking and impressive historic building. Secondly, the feeling of awe on seeing the size of the great dinosaur skeletons in the Natural History Museum in New York would be impossible to experience by simply looking at an image on a laptop or cell phone. It would be an immense loss if such places were to close their doors to the public. In conclusion, although these cultural facilities have unique aesthetic qualities, now that people can acess their treasures thanks to the digital revolution, the expense of keeping them open cannot be justified
It is true that technology gives most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
a chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
historical objects and works of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
on a computer screen. I partly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the view,
therefore
, that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
are no longer necessary.

It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
expensive to maintain a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gallery
, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
provide funding for these institutions. If national or local authorities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
allocate resources to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
these cultural facilities open, then less money is available to spend on health, education and social services. Faced with such a choice,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries opt for a mixed funding model for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
costs.
Therefore
, I believe that it is an unaffordable luxury to retain these wonderful public collections. Their artifacts and paintings can all
be accessed
freely
and almost
instantly
at the touch of a key on a computer keyboard.

While I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
galleries
are not essential in this computer age, I would be sad to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
their disappearance.
Firstly
, the buildings which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
their collections are themselves part of our tangible cultural heritage.
For example
, the National
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Gallery
in London is a striking and impressive historic building.
Secondly
, the feeling of awe on seeing the size of the great dinosaur skeletons in the Natural History
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
in New York would be impossible to experience by
simply
looking at an image on a laptop or cell phone. It would be an immense loss if such places were to close their doors to the public.

In conclusion
, although these cultural facilities have unique aesthetic qualities,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
Possible spelling mistake found.
acess
their treasures thanks to the digital revolution, the expense of keeping them open cannot
be justified
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
13Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people claim that museums and art galleries are not needed today, because everyone can see historical objects or art works by computer. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
284 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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