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Some people choose to eat no meat or fish. They believe that this is not only better for their own health but also benefits the world as a whole. v.15

Some people choose to eat no meat or fish. They believe that this is not only better for their own health but also benefits the world as a whole. v. 15
Vegetarians tend to avoid consuming meat and fish on the purpose of keeping body health and concerning on environmental issue. Both purposes will be discussed in this essay as well as provide several convincing explanations. Vegetarians tend to consider health factors to stop consuming meat and fish because those kinds of food sources affect the blood tension of those who suffer from chronic disease such as cancer, obesity, etc. Other reasons from a health point of view of people become vegetarian because they need to lose the weight or to have a better body shape. Moreover, choosing to consume vegetables rather than meat or fish becomes a trend to keep the body healthy. On the other hand, being a vegetarian is one of the ways to protest the policy of the government or criminal action that against the environmental issues such as cruel animal slaughtering, fish-bombing, etc. Moreover, being vegetarian is believed as the best solution for keeping the balance of ecosystem among humans and animals. However, another reason not to eat meat or fish is related to ethical concern on how there are several values or rules in a certain community that forbid to eat both of food sources. They believe that animals are just like human being that should be respected as well as conserve their lives. To conclude, vegetarians who consider health issues and environmental issues, as well as ethical concern, have their own reasons. In addition, both views are merely positive to keep the body health individually as well as to conserve the sustainability of animal lives globally.
Vegetarians tend to avoid consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
and fish on the purpose of keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and concerning on environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
. Both purposes will
be discussed
in this essay as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as provide several convincing explanations.

Vegetarians tend to consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
factors to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
and fish
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
those kinds of food sources affect the blood tension of those who suffer from chronic disease such as cancer, obesity, etc. Other reasons from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
point of view of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
become vegetarian
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they need to lose the weight or to have a better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
shape.
Moreover
, choosing to consume vegetables
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
or fish becomes a trend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
healthy.

On the other hand
, being a vegetarian is one of the ways to protest the policy of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
or criminal action that against the environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
such as cruel animal slaughtering, fish-bombing, etc.
Moreover
, being vegetarian
is believed
as the best solution for keeping the balance of ecosystem among humans and animals.

However
, another reason not to eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meat
or fish
is related
to ethical concern on how there are several values or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
in a certain community that forbid to eat both of food sources. They believe that animals are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
like human being that should
be respected
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as conserve their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

To conclude
, vegetarians who consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
and environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as ethical concern, have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
reasons.
In addition
, both views are
merely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
individually
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as to conserve the sustainability of animal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
globally.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people choose to eat no meat or fish. They believe that this is not only better for their own health but also benefits the world as a whole. v. 15

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
262 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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