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Some people buy their children whatever they ask for and allow their children to do whatever they want. Is it a good way to raise children? What consequences could this style of parenting have for children as they get older? v.1

Some people buy their children whatever they ask for and allow their children to do whatever they want. Is it a good way to raise children? What consequences could this style of parenting have for children as they get older? v. 1
The decency of a living place is determined by various factors, from living conditions, it provides, to local residents' satisfaction. Therefore, there is a judgement that densely populated city does not always equate to an ideal one. From my personal perspective, whether a megacity can be a perfect dwelling or not depends on a myriad of different criteria. In the first place, a metropolitan area with a large population could serve as a favourable residence for people to inhabit. In the light of its abundant human resource, a crowded city is likely to magnetize a substantial influx of both international and national corporations to establish their head offices. As a result, inhabitants will enjoy more positive job prospects with a wide range of occupations at their disposal. Additionally, local residents will reap dividends from a better living standard. Equipped with state- of- the- art technologies, metropolises offer students with an innovative and modernized education. Furthermore, there is a variety of options for recreations, for example, theatres and cinemas, which people can visit and unwind themselves. Nevertheless, the aforementioned assumption is actually not the case with every packed urban zone. In many megacities, although they do stimulate more career opportunities, a noticeable proportion of employees are only entrusted with merely menial tasks or working as sweated labour. Consequently, they suffer from a worsening health condition, not to mention their inconsistent incomes. Living in an overcrowded town, the paucity of accommodation is another spectre that these urban residents fear. An obvious illustration of this point is Luanda, the capital city of Angola. The city builds itself as an international hub in the South African region, however, against the prosperous backdrop is abject poverty, 5 million people are incurring in their unstable squalors with improper sanitation and water supply. In other words, a crowded city does not necessarily guarantee happiness and fulfilment for its locals. From my viewpoint, in order to become a truly great city, three following standards should be underscored. Firstly, it must have the capability to provide all basic necessities for its dwellers, which include adequate shelter, sufficient groceries, or sound education. Secondly, an ideal city affords its Denizens opportunities to develop and prove themselves. For instance, it should incentivise a dynamic start- up climate, or erect a diverse job market for young generations to enter the limelight. Finally, the grassroots’ happiness is a hallmark of a great city, as via this aspect, it demonstrates that the authorities have managed to satisfy their residents' demands. In conclusion, a populous city is not always synonymous with a utopia, as the concept of a great city is dependent on a host of qualities. Personally, should a place achieve the aforesaid trifecta, it would be a wholesome destination for anyone to reside in.
The decency of a
living
place
is determined
by various factors, from
living
conditions, it provides, to local residents' satisfaction.
Therefore
, there is a judgement that
densely
populated city does not always equate to an ideal one. From my personal perspective, whether a
megacity
can be a perfect dwelling or not depends on a myriad of
different
criteria.

In the
first
place, a metropolitan area with a large population could serve as a
favourable
residence for
people
to inhabit. In the light of its abundant human resource, a crowded city is likely to magnetize a substantial influx of both international and national corporations to establish their head offices.
As a result
, inhabitants will enjoy more
positive
job prospects with a wide range of occupations at their disposal.
Additionally
, local residents will reap dividends from a better
living
standard. Equipped with state- of- the- art technologies, metropolises offer students with an innovative and modernized education.
Furthermore
, there is a variety of options for recreations,
for example
,
theatres
and cinemas, which
people
can visit and unwind themselves.

Nevertheless
, the aforementioned assumption is actually not the case with every packed urban zone. In
many
megacities
, although they do stimulate more career opportunities, a noticeable proportion of employees are
only
entrusted with
merely
menial tasks or working as sweated
labour
.
Consequently
, they suffer from a worsening health condition, not to mention their inconsistent incomes.
Living
in an overcrowded town, the paucity of accommodation is another
spectre
that these urban residents fear. An obvious illustration of this point is Luanda, the capital city of Angola. The city builds itself as an international hub in the South African region,
however
, against the prosperous backdrop is abject poverty, 5 million
people
are incurring in their unstable
squalors
with improper sanitation and water supply.
In other words
, a crowded city does not
necessarily
guarantee happiness and
fulfilment
for its locals.

From my viewpoint, in order to become a
truly
great city, three following standards should
be underscored
.
Firstly
, it
must
have the capability to provide all
basic necessities
for its dwellers, which include adequate shelter, sufficient groceries, or sound education.
Secondly
, an ideal city affords its Denizens opportunities to develop and prove themselves.
For instance
, it should
incentivise
a dynamic
start
- up climate, or erect a diverse job market for young generations to enter the limelight.
Finally
, the grassroots’ happiness is a hallmark of a great city, as via this aspect, it demonstrates that the authorities have managed to satisfy their residents' demands.

In conclusion
, a populous city is not always synonymous with a utopia, as the concept of a great city is dependent on a host of qualities.
Personally
, should a place achieve the aforesaid trifecta, it would be a wholesome destination for anyone to reside in.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people buy their children whatever they ask for and allow their children to do whatever they want. Is it a good way to raise children? What consequences could this style of parenting have for children as they get older? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
460 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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