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Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree v.5

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to younger children). v. 5
Giving back to society by the way of carrying out social work such as voluntary tutoring younger folks sport and developing the community have been argued by some individuals to be made compulsory as part of the Secondary School curriculum. Personally, I am of the view that it is not a bad idea because it will help in grooming them as a responsible adult in shaping society at large and developing their mind. It, however, it should be voluntary. To start with, there are several benefits that will be derived in this action. One of such is helping to inculcate an act of responsibility on High school student which shape the society at large. This means that they will be able to take charge of the proper wellness of their environment if they are involved in community service, An example of this when the Sanitation Programme was introduced to Lagos in the year 2000. It was structured in such a way that it is the duty of children in age 12 -18 will be in charge of cleaning the community park every Saturday that ends the month. Hence, the program made the teens learn more about being responsible, in addition, they also learn about cleanliness. Another point to consider is that volunteering will help the children in developing their overall character and mental alertness. In other words, it will in sharpening their mind and brain since they will have to develop high band skill in training others in different skills. For instance, A High school student that agrees to take Preschool Mental mathematics will want to go the extra miles to have a deeper knowledge about the subject in order not to be challenged. Thus, this single act will make him do proper research which will widen his or her brain capacity. Nevertheless, Proper monitoring should be on the Schoolchildren when carrying out this work because many of them believe that the time allocated for the services gives them the avenue to play around with their friends rather than a learning process. To wrap up, although engaging in compulsory Social service by high schools student as its own drawbacks. It is still a useful tool in helping secondary students to act responsibly and developing their mental reasoning. In as much that it is closely monitored students should be encouraged to carry out the services.
Giving back to society by the way of carrying out social work such as voluntary tutoring younger folks sport and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developing
the community have
been argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals to
be made
compulsory as part of the Secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
School
curriculum.
Personally
, I am of the view that it is not a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in grooming them as a responsible adult in shaping society at large and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developing
their mind. It,
however
, it should be voluntary.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, there are several benefits that will
be derived
in this action. One of such is helping to inculcate an act of responsibility on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
High
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
which shape the society at large. This means that they will be able to take charge of the proper wellness of their environment if they
are involved
in community
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
, An example of this when the Sanitation
Possible spelling mistake. 'Programme' is British English.
Programme
was introduced
to Lagos in the year 2000. It
was structured
in such a way that it is the duty of children in age 12 -18 will be in charge of cleaning the community park every Saturday that ends the month.
Hence
, the program made the teens learn more about being responsible,
in addition
, they
also
learn about cleanliness.

Another point to consider is that volunteering will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the children in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developing
their
overall
character and mental alertness.
In other words
, it will in sharpening their mind and brain since they will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
develop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
band
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
in training others in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
For instance
, A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
High
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
to take Preschool Mental mathematics will want to go the extra miles to have a deeper knowledge about the subject in order not to
be challenged
.
Thus
, this single act will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
him do proper research which will widen
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
his or her
brain capacity.

Nevertheless
, Proper monitoring should be on the Schoolchildren when carrying out this work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of them believe that the time allocated for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
gives them the avenue to play around with their friends
rather
than a learning process.

To wrap up, although engaging in compulsory Social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
as its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
drawbacks. It is
still
a useful tool in helping secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to act
responsibly
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developing
their mental reasoning. In as much that it is
closely
monitored
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should
be encouraged
to carry out the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to younger children). v. 5

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
394 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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