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Some people believe that there will be a reduction in air travel in the future. Do you think that this trend is a positive or negative development? v.1

Some people believe that there will be a reduction in air travel in the future. Do you think that this trend is a positive or negative development? v. 1
The Majority of mankind trusts that the air transportation numbers will get decreased in upcoming years. In my point of view, I believe it may cause a negative impact on our economy. Apart from that, it will also influence various effects like traffic congestion, tourist income and deforestation. Firstly, the flight journey is considered to be the fastest travel medium. Though due to its declining rate it makes difficult to plan medical emergency, personal urgency at a faster pace. Does it cost our national economy much? Yes, it is. Tourists prefer to travel through the air, which is directly proportional to income from the tourism industry. For instance, more travellers more revenue. Secondly, connection around the world will be at stake. Since the expansion of the air network will be reduced, many unexplored places will remain unreachable. Consumption of fossil fuels will pave a pathway to pollutions. Also, it is possible that we may run out of natural source of fuels soon. More road or rail transports needs to be increased which in turn makes deforestation to grow. To summarise, the negative impact is considerably higher compared to the positive ones. We need to think cause and effect for each trend. Though it also has various negatives like safety, climate dependant. It is up to us to decide the trend and take it further.
The Majority of mankind trusts that the air transportation numbers will
get
decreased in upcoming years. In my point of view, I believe it may cause a
negative
impact on our economy. Apart from that, it will
also
influence various effects like traffic congestion, tourist income and deforestation.

Firstly
, the flight journey
is considered
to be the fastest travel medium. Though due to its declining rate it
makes
difficult to plan medical emergency, personal urgency at a faster pace. Does it cost our national economy much? Yes, it is. Tourists prefer to travel through the air, which is
directly
proportional to income from the tourism industry.
For instance
, more
travellers
more revenue.

Secondly
, connection around the world will be at stake. Since the expansion of the air network will be
reduced
,
many
unexplored places will remain unreachable. Consumption of fossil fuels will pave a pathway to pollutions.
Also
, it is possible that we may run out of natural source of fuels
soon
. More road or rail transports needs to
be increased
which in turn
makes
deforestation to grow.

To
summarise
, the
negative
impact is
considerably
higher compared to the
positive
ones. We need to
think
cause and effect for each trend. Though it
also
has various negatives like safety, climate
dependant
. It is up to us to decide the trend and take it
further
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that there will be a reduction in air travel in the future. Do you think that this trend is a positive or negative development? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
224 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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