Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people believe that the fast pace and stress of modern life is having a negative effect on families. To what extent do you agree or disagree v.2

Some people believe that the fast pace and stress of modern life is having a negative effect on families. v. 2
Some argue that the high speed and pressure of modern living adversely affect families. I completely agree that the fast pace and stress have negative effects on family life. Firstly, this essay will discuss the consequences of not spending enough time with family and secondly, discuss how work stress affects marriage. Spending less time with family is the cause of a range of family problems. Members do not meet each other often or with their assistance when needed. As a result, they feel lonely in their own family, so slowly family members become strangers. For example, children born and raised in families whose parents are busy with work often do not feel family affection and are easily seduced and dragged into social evils. Eventually, a conflict began to arise, parents blaming each other for the problems of their children, fading family sentiments and broken family background. Broken marriages often start with a lot of work pressure. People cannot get rid of everything at work and often bring them home. when a person is under a lot of stress, they are no longer rational and loving enough to act properly with those around them, especially their spouse. The two begin to reveal and develop weaknesses that make their partners tired and gradually depressed. A recent survey has shown that the rate of breakage in marriage in high-pressure industries is much higher than in other fields. In conclusion, I totally agree that with the view that home life is heavily influenced by the pressures and hustle of modern society.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
argue that the high speed and pressure of modern living
adversely
affect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
pace and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
life.
Firstly
, this essay will discuss the consequences of not spending
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and
secondly
, discuss how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
affects marriage.

Spending less time with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
is the cause of a range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
problems. Members do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
each other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
or with their assistance when needed.
As a result
, they feel lonely in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
slowly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members become strangers.
For example
, children born and raised in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
whose parents are busy with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
do not feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
affection and are
easily
seduced and dragged into social evils.
Eventually
, a conflict began to arise, parents blaming each other for the problems of their children, fading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
sentiments and broken
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
background.

Broken marriages
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
pressure.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of everything at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
bring them home.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
when
a person is under
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
, they are no longer rational and loving
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to act
properly
with those around them,
especially
their spouse. The two
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
to reveal and develop weaknesses that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their partners tired and
gradually
depressed. A recent survey has shown that the rate of breakage in marriage in high-pressure industries is much higher than in other fields.

In conclusion
, I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that with the view that home life is
heavily
influenced by the pressures and hustle of modern society.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that the fast pace and stress of modern life is having a negative effect on families. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts