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Some people believe that the biggest problem facing cities is the increasing number of cars. Others say there more serious problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.1

Some people believe that the biggest problem facing cities is the increasing number of cars. Others say there more serious problems. v. 1
In recent years, major causes of pollution has become debatable. Many individuals share the viewpoint that the most significant issue is the rise in the amount of vehicles because this increases environmental pollution. I am of the opinion that there are more detrimental setbacks such as, usage of plastic materials and building of industries within the towns. Those who support the view that the most significant issue is vehicles may argue on the basis of increase environmental pollution. In other words, one of the major causes of air pollutant is the fumes released from machines. Take for example, the city of Lagos, according to the Global health Institute in 2017, revealed that, we produced approximately 2. 3 million tons of smoke which has drastically risen from about 1. 2 million tons in 1990. Thus, resulting in one of the leading factors of air pollution. However, I would argue that, while the rationale above is correct there are many major factors affecting our communities. One of such is, the use of plastic bags. This implies that, the use of rubber materials such as bags and bottles has caused more harm than good resulting in land, water and air pollution. According to a research carried out by the United Nations in 2019, for instance, revealed that about 600 million tons of plastic wastes are being produced yearly around the world, and since they are non biodegradable it takes 100 to 1000 years for such waste to eventually leave the earth. As a result, more damage is being done to not only the land but also the ocean beds and the atmosphere, of such materials are eventually burnt. In conclusion, while I believe that smoke released from cars are dangerous to the environment, I am of the opinion that there are more major factors that affect our surroundings such as, plastic bags and bottles.
In recent years,
major
causes of
pollution
has become debatable.
Many
individuals share the viewpoint that the most significant issue is the rise in the amount of vehicles
because
this increases environmental
pollution
. I am of the opinion that there are more detrimental setbacks such as, usage of
plastic
materials and building of industries within the towns.

Those who support the view that the most significant issue is vehicles may argue on the basis of increase environmental
pollution
.
In other words
, one of the
major
causes of air pollutant is the fumes released from machines. Take
for example
, the city of Lagos, according to the Global health Institute in 2017, revealed that, we produced approximately 2. 3 million tons of smoke which has
drastically
risen from about 1. 2 million tons in 1990.
Thus
, resulting in one of the leading factors of air pollution.

However
, I would argue that, while the rationale above is correct there are
many
major
factors affecting our communities. One of such is, the
use
of
plastic
bags.
This implies that
, the
use
of rubber materials such as bags and bottles has caused more harm than
good
resulting in land, water and air
pollution
. According to
a research
carried out by the United Nations in 2019,
for instance
, revealed that about 600 million tons of
plastic
wastes are
being produced
yearly around the world, and since they are
non biodegradable
it takes 100 to 1000 years for such waste to
eventually
leave
the earth.
As a result
, more damage is
being done
to not
only
the land
but
also
the ocean beds and the atmosphere, of such materials are
eventually
burnt.

In conclusion
, while I believe that smoke released from cars are
dangerous
to the environment, I am of the opinion that there are more
major
factors that affect our surroundings such as,
plastic
bags and bottles.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things.
Flora Lewis

IELTS essay Some people believe that the biggest problem facing cities is the increasing number of cars. Others say there more serious problems. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
311 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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