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Some people believe that the best way to succeed is to set goals and work hardto achieve them. Other people think that hard work is not as important as good luck. Which point of view do you think is true and why? v.1

Some people believe that the best way to succeed is to set goals and work hardto achieve them. Other people think that hard work is not as important as good luck. Which point of view do you think is true and why? v. 1
Number of vehicles are increasing rapidly around the world. Vehicle congestion is becoming a serious concern for major cities around the world. But is there a way this issue can be handled? This essay will discuss the different reasons for gridlock and possible solutions for the same. This blockage can be mainly attributed to two main reasons. Firstly, the increasing number of vehicles on highway has resulted in an unprecedented increase in traffic. For example, in the city of Mumbai alone, the density of vehicles is doubling each year. Secondly, it has raised due to lack of proper infrastructure. Since with the rising number of vehicles, the roads have not been expanded, the gridlock has elevated. For instance, no new highways were made and the quantity of two wheelers has doubled in the city of Mumbai in a year. So the primary reasons for this blockage are more vehicles and lack of more highways. There are two main solutions that can be implemented in order to resolve the motorway jam. Primarily, by improving the roads, the traffic can be drastically reduced. By having good highways, the vehicles can be diverted more efficiently and effectively. To illustrate, a major chunk of motors can be handled by using fly overs. Secondarily, the use of public transport can be beneficial. By using public commute modes, number of vehicles used is reduced which results in less motors on the road. For example, a metro train can accommodate nearly 200 individuals, which effectively means 200 less vehicles on the road. Thus, this gridlock can be tackled by improving roads and by using public transport. Traffic blockage is a major problem across many cities around the world. This essay discussed why increasing population and poor road infrastructure are the major contributors of traffic congestion. This essay also discussed how this congestion can be tackled by improving roads and use of public transport.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
are increasing
rapidly
around the world.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Vehicle
congestion is becoming a serious concern for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
around the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
is there a way this issue can
be handled
? This essay will discuss the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
reasons for gridlock and possible solutions for the same.

This blockage can be
mainly
attributed to two main reasons.
Firstly
, the increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
on highway has resulted in an unprecedented increase in traffic.
For example
, in the city of Mumbai alone, the density of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
is doubling each year.
Secondly
, it has raised due to lack of proper infrastructure. Since with the rising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
have not
been expanded
, the gridlock has elevated.
For instance
, no new highways
were made
and the quantity of
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
two wheelers
has doubled in the city of Mumbai in a year.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
the primary reasons for this blockage are more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
and lack of more highways.

There are two main solutions that can
be implemented
in order to resolve the motorway jam.
Primarily
, by improving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
, the traffic can be
drastically
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
. By having
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
highways, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
can
be diverted
more
efficiently
and
effectively
. To illustrate, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
major
chunk of motors can
be handled
by using
fly
overs.
Secondarily
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transport can be beneficial. By using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
commute modes,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
which results in
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun motors is countable.
less
motors on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
.
For example
, a metro train can accommodate
nearly
200 individuals, which
effectively
means 200
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun vehicles is countable.
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
.
Thus
, this gridlock can
be tackled
by improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
and by using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transport.

Traffic blockage is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
major
problem across
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
around the world. This essay discussed why increasing population and poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
infrastructure are the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
major
contributors of traffic congestion. This essay
also
discussed how this congestion can
be tackled
by improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transport.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that the best way to succeed is to set goals and work hardto achieve them. Other people think that hard work is not as important as good luck. Which point of view do you think is true and why? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
316 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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