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Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child's development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion. You should write at least 250 words. v.11

Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child's development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion. v. 11
Some people agrued that learning at home is the best way for children’s growth, but others think that parents should send their kids to school. In my point of view, I think children who attend to school have more experience than children who join in homeschooling. On the one hand, it is essential to send children to public or private school. Right here, children have a chance to develop their human beings. Day by day, they can acquire knowledge from life lessons about their local or over world. So, gradually it enriches children’s mind and they become more self-confident when making new friends. Another factor to consider is attending to school not only helps children develop their mind but also their body. For instance, playing sports outside studying hours helps them to challenge and improve themselves. Furthermore, it also teaches them how to work in a team effectively and develops their physical strength. Therefore, children who study at school can have good opportunities for themselves in the future. On the other hand, homeschooling is better for children who need especial intention. To particular children, they don’t need care or notice from others. Some parents are often worried of their children’s health hence they choose homeschooling to easily look after their children. In low family, they always hesitate to pay money for children’s studying because of high fee. For example, if children learn at home, parents will save amount of money for family life. Consequently, I think Students can focus on subject very effective when they learn alone without friends of social activities. I think it brings both benefit and negation, but in general, this is not a best way for children’s growth. In conclusion, school has much advantage for students’ development and for parenting. Following me, I totally encourage that attending to school is very important. I hope the government will enforce laws for compulsive attendant to school. Besides, government also cut down fee appropriate for low family and encourage them to send their children to school as soon as.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
agrued
that learning at home is the best way for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
growth,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that parents should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their kids to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. In my point of view, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
attend to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
have more experience than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
in homeschooling.

On the one hand, it is essential to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to public or private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. Right here,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have a chance to develop their human beings. Day by day, they can acquire knowledge from life lessons about their local or over world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
gradually
it enriches
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
mind and
they become more self-confident when making new friends. Another factor to consider is attending to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
develop their mind
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
their body.
For instance
, playing sports outside studying hours
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to challenge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
themselves.
Furthermore
, it
also
teaches them how to work in a team
effectively
and develops their physical strength.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
study at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
can have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
opportunities for themselves in the future.

On the other hand
, homeschooling is better for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
need especial intention. To particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, they don’t need care or notice from others.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
parents are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
worried of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
health
hence
they choose homeschooling to
easily
look after their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. In low family, they always hesitate to pay money for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
studying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of high fee.
For example
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
learn at home, parents will save amount of money for family life.
Consequently
, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
Students can focus on subject
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
effective when they learn alone without friends of social activities. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
it brings both benefit and negation,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in general
, this is not
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
best way for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
growth.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
has much advantage for students’ development and for parenting. Following me, I
totally
encourage that attending to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. I hope the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
will enforce laws for compulsive attendant to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
Besides
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down fee appropriate for low family and encourage them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as.
15Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
33Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child's development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion. v. 11

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
340 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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