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Some people believe that success in life comes from taking risks or chances. Others believe that success results from careful planning. In your opinion, what does success come from? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.4

Some people believe that success in life comes from taking risks or chances. Others believe that success results from careful planning. In your opinion, what does success come from? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 4
In recent years, individual life's are too much engaged in achieving luxurious lifestyle. For that, folks are spending more and more time on career growth as an effect they get high wages for copping high standards of life rather than parenting their offsprings. In my opinion, parents have an important role in the nurture of their children, but schools and society have also a greater part in children brought up. So in this essay I am going to discuss both views. On the one hand, parents are always helping kids in self confidence, socially responsible and how to live independently. For this they gave opportunities for their toddlers to learn how to tackle their life problems, interact with individuals as well individual living style like cooking, how to earn early age, for study they will go easily to the whole world and helping others. Due to parent involvement, children will learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. For example, in Asian countries, parents are paying full attention to their children's brought up while keeping an eye on their academic and extracurricular activities which can be helped to parents to rectify their misconducts. On the other hand, School and society also have a great impact on youngsters. At the institute, kids have bad company it might have led to be a bad thing to do and community may help to proceed these bad habits as a result kids create social problems, so its not complete responsibility of mother and father. For instance, in Eastern countries giving extra freedom to youngsters is making up the crimes day by day. To Sum up, I believe that parents are not fully concerned in bringing up of their toddlers also involve society and academies.
In recent years, individual life's are too much engaged in achieving luxurious lifestyle. For that, folks are spending more and more time on career growth as an effect they
get
high wages for copping high standards of life
rather
than parenting their
offsprings
. In my opinion,
parents
have an
important
role in the nurture of their children,
but
schools and society have
also
a greater part in children brought up.
So
in this essay I am going to discuss both views.

On the one hand,
parents
are always helping kids in
self confidence
,
socially
responsible and how to
live
independently
. For this they gave opportunities for their toddlers to learn how to tackle their life problems, interact with individuals
as well
individual living style like cooking, how to earn early age, for study they will go
easily
to the whole world and helping others. Due to
parent
involvement, children will learn the difference between right and
wrong
at an early age.
For example
, in Asian countries,
parents
are paying full attention to their children's brought up while keeping an eye on their academic and extracurricular activities which can be
helped
to
parents
to rectify their misconducts.

On the other hand
, School and society
also
have a great impact on youngsters. At the institute, kids have
bad
company
it might have led to be a
bad
thing to do and community may
help
to proceed these
bad
habits
as a result
kids create social problems,
so
its not complete responsibility of mother and father.
For instance
, in Eastern countries giving extra freedom to youngsters is making up the crimes day by day.

To Sum up, I believe that
parents
are not
fully
concerned in bringing up of their toddlers
also
involve society and academies.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that success in life comes from taking risks or chances. Others believe that success results from careful planning. In your opinion, what does success come from? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
293 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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