Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people believe that scientific research should be carried out by government only not by private companies. To what extent do you agree? v.2

Some people believe that scientific research should be carried out by government only not by private companies. v. 2
Scientific experiments are indispensable for all new discoveries. In the contemporary world, many government bodies and private corporations perform research at their facilities. A vast majority of the general public has opposite views about the involvement of private companies into science research platforms. I am in consummate accord with the notion that only governments should be allowed to be perform research projects. First and foremost reason for such an ideology is safety. Publicly funded Laboratories are specifically designed and constructed for scientific purposes and are far more safer to deal with critical experimental materials. Most of the times the Government funded buildings and labs are equipped with state of the art safety features. These organizations also contain more operating capital to implement safety regulations. All of the research work involves careful and safe handling of dangerous chemicals, live specimens, and radioactive materials; therefore, can jeopardize public health if safety policies are not strictly followed. More often, private institutions do not have such an infrastructure and accidents remain at the brink of happening. For example, One private hospital in India exposed number of children to the HIV virus during a clinical trail. Secondly, Private multinational corporations envision profit out of their research outcome. Nearly all big businesses endeavour to patent their research products and make billions of dollars by selling those products. For instance, various drug manufacturing companies invent drugs under their own control and supervision then later sell the medicines at very high cost. This is because the millions of people in developing nations are deprived from necessary medical treatment. To encapsulate, I believe if the imperative scientific discoveries are carried out under the government control then people can benefit from safer techniques and highly valuable research outcomes.
Scientific experiments are indispensable for all new discoveries. In the contemporary world,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
bodies and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
corporations perform
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
at their facilities. A vast majority of the
Consider using "public".
general public
has opposite views about the involvement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
into science
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
platforms. I am in consummate accord with the notion that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
should be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to be
Consider using a past participle here: "performed".
perform
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
projects.

First
and foremost reason for such an ideology is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
.
Publicly
funded Laboratories are
specifically
designed and constructed for scientific purposes and are far
Use only "safer" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more safer
to deal with critical experimental materials.
Consider using "most of the time" if you mean "usually" or "very often".
Most of the times
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
funded buildings and labs
are equipped
with state of the art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
features. These organizations
also
contain more operating capital to implement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
regulations.
Consider using "all the".
All of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
work involves careful and safe handling of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
chemicals,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
specimens, and radioactive materials;
therefore
, can jeopardize public health if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
safety
policies are not
strictly
followed. More
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
institutions do not have such an infrastructure and accidents remain at the brink of happening.
For example
, One
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
hospital in India exposed number of children to the
This phrase is redundant ('V' stands for 'virus'). Use simply "HIV".
HIV virus
during a clinical trail.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Private
multinational corporations envision profit out of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
outcome.
Nearly
all
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
businesses
Possible spelling mistake. 'endeavour' is British English.
endeavour
to patent their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
products and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
billions of dollars by selling those products.
For instance
, various drug manufacturing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
invent drugs under their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
control and supervision then later sell the medicines at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
high cost. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the millions of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in developing nations are
The usual collocation for "deprived" is "of" not "". Did you mean "deprived of"?
deprived from
necessary medical treatment.

To encapsulate, I believe if the imperative scientific discoveries
are carried
out under the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
control then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can benefit from safer techniques and
highly
valuable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
outcomes.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that scientific research should be carried out by government only not by private companies. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts