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Some people believe that robots will play an important role in future societies, while others argue that robots might have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.1

Some people believe that robots will play an important role in future societies, while others argue that robots might have negative effects on society. v. 1
Robots are likely to become as ubiquitous as the smartphone computers we all carry in our future society. While some people argue that robots might have negative impacts on the future society, personally I believe that the benefits of the robot are likely to outweigh the negative aspects of it. On the one hand, there are two main reasons why it could be argued that robots might have adverse effects on society in the future. Firstly, some people believe that robots will have a negative impact on the human workforce. The people will be replaced by machines and this will increase the unemployment rate. As a result, many other problems may emerge such as poverty and increased crimes. Secondly, people will become more dependent on robots in their daily life and this may harmfully affect their skills as cooking and driving. So people become less active and this may result in some health problems like obesity. On the other hand, I would agree with those who argue that robots will play important positive roles in future society. The first role is that robots could operate in locations that humans cannot reach such as exploration of the outer space. They can act as extended eyes for humans enabling them to look beyond their visual boundaries. Moreover, robots will be used inside the human bodies for monitoring their health and undertake surgery. The second role that will be played by robots is the helping of elderly and retired people with their daily life activities like cooking and cleaning. Finally, robots could do normal jobs quickly unlike human beings. Robots don not complain or get distracted or tired. They readily work twenty-four hours and require minimal maintenance. In conclusion, there are convincing arguments both for in and against the role of robots in our future would, but I believe that the robots will add many benefits to the future society.
Robots are likely to become as ubiquitous as the smartphone computers we all carry in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that robots might have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
,
personally
I believe that the benefits of the robot are likely to outweigh the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspects of it.

On the one hand, there are two main reasons why it could
be argued
that robots might have adverse effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that robots will have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
workforce. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
be replaced
by machines and this will increase the unemployment rate.
As a result
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other problems may emerge such as poverty and increased crimes.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will become more dependent on robots in their daily life and this may
harmfully
affect their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
as cooking and driving.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
become less active and this may result in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
health problems like obesity.

On the other hand
, I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with those who argue that robots will play
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roles
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
. The
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
is that robots could operate in locations that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
cannot reach such as exploration of the outer space. They can act as extended eyes for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
enabling them to look beyond their visual boundaries.
Moreover
, robots will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
inside the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
bodies for monitoring their health and undertake surgery. The second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
that will
be played
by robots is the helping of elderly and retired
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with their daily life activities like cooking and cleaning.
Finally
, robots could do normal jobs
quickly
unlike
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings. Robots
Did you mean "do not"?
don not
complain or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
distracted or tired. They
readily
work twenty-four hours and require minimal maintenance.

In conclusion
, there are convincing arguments both for in and against the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
role
of robots in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
would,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I believe that the robots will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that robots will play an important role in future societies, while others argue that robots might have negative effects on society. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
317 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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