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Some people believe that online reading material should be only used for child to learn to read whereas believe that only printed materials should be used Discuss both views and give your opinion v.1

Some people believe that online reading material should be only used for child to learn to read whereas believe that only printed materials should be used 1
Some people believe that creative artists should have absolute freedom to create their own artwork without any restriction from government. Others believe some form of artifices should not be available to the general public. In this essay, I am going to discuss if creative artists should always be given the freedom to express their own ideas without any influence by the government. I believe artists should have complete freedom on what they would like to create. By limiting what an artist can create, it is limiting their creativity. Art pieces, no matter it is in words, picture, music or film format, enrich people's mind. What makes a human different from an animal is our ability of complex reasoning, using of complex language, and solve complicated problems. Artwork enables us to deliver complex ideas in a form that people can share among people. However, I also believe not all artwork should be available to the general public. As discussed earlier, artwork enables us to present ideas in a form that people easier share among us. Some people might use this as a medium for propaganda harmful message to the general public. For example, people can create messages to encourage racialism, human slaughtering, sex trafficking or prompting violent. Even though art piece creation should not be restricted by the government, certain arts should be accessible only by certain ages to prevent harmful message delivered to the young generation that might not have enough experience to judge if something is right or wrong. In conclusion, government should create an atmosphere that allows artists have no restriction on their artwork creation. However, certain art pieces should not be accessible by part of the public. By giving artists sufficient freedom allows them to create any art-pieces as they wish. Limiting the access of such art by ages allows the government creates harmony in our society.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that creative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
should have absolute
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artwork
without any restriction from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
. Others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
form of artifices should not be available to the general
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
. In this essay, I am going to discuss if creative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
should always be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
to express their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
without any influence by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.

I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
should have complete
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
on what they would like to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
. By limiting what an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artist
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
, it is limiting their creativity.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Art
pieces, no matter it is in words, picture, music or film format, enrich
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's mind. What
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
a human
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from an animal is our ability of complex reasoning, using of complex language, and solve complicated problems.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Artwork
enables us to deliver complex
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
in a form that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can share among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

However
, I
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
not all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artwork
should be available to the general
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
. As discussed earlier,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artwork
enables us to present
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
in a form that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
easier share among us.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
this as a medium for propaganda harmful message to the general
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
messages to encourage racialism, human slaughtering, sex trafficking or prompting violent.
Even though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
piece creation should not
be restricted
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
, certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
should be accessible
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
by certain ages to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
harmful message delivered to the young generation that might not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
experience to judge if something is right or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
an atmosphere that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
have no restriction on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artwork
creation.
However
, certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
pieces should not be accessible by part of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
. By giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
sufficient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
freedom
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
create
any art-pieces as they wish. Limiting the access of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
by ages
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
creates
harmony in our society.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Do you know what a foreign accent is? It’s a sign of bravery.
Amy Chua

IELTS essay Some people believe that online reading material should be only used for child to learn to read whereas believe that only printed materials should be used 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
310 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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