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Some people believe that it is wrong to keep animals in zoos, while others think that zoos are both entertainment and ecological important. Discuss both views. v.7

Zoos remain popular places for people to visit for entertainment and to learn about wild animals. While some people believe that zoos play an important role in protecting wild animals, others feel that keeping animals locked up in such places is cruel and unnecessary. I'm going to explain two views of the following essay. These days many people posit that zoos are useful in some regards. Firstly, they believe zoos can help endangered animals and keep them from poachers, urbanization, and countless wild nature dangers. In line with this purpose, many zoos try to save more species and deter them from becoming extinct. Secondly, zoos are beautiful and peaceful places for spending time with your family and learning about wild animals since there is no other solution to spend our time among wild animals and learn about them rather than zoos. It can help to increase our knowledge about them and avoid being harmful to them. However, there are more convincing arguments for why zoos should be shut down. First, zoos are not capable of protecting the large majority of species from being haunted or destroyed due to the destruction of their habitat. In my eye, each government must fund programs to avoid environmental destruction and help these animals be safe in their own habitat. They are the same as every free species that don’t deserve to be kept behind bars for their entire lives. Their distress is obvious from walking over the cage all day long. Moreover, zoo animals are more likely to be there just for the entertainment of visitors. In some zoos, they are mistreated in many ways, such as insufficient food and medical care and childish mischief of visitors that disturb their peaceful resting. In conclusion, animals should be protected, but zoos are not the proper protection they demand several reasons besides their cruelty to animals, not enough similarity to their national habitat, and animals suffer outweighs the benefits of zoos. So, after all, zoos should be closed down.
Zoos remain popular places for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to visit for entertainment and to learn about wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that zoos play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in protecting wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
, others feel that keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
locked up in such places is cruel and unnecessary. I'm going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
two views of the following essay.

These days
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
posit that zoos are useful in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
regards.
Firstly
, they believe zoos can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
endangered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
them from poachers, urbanization, and countless wild nature
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
dangers
. In line with this purpose,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
zoos try to save more species and deter them from becoming extinct.
Secondly
, zoos are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
and peaceful places for spending time with your family and learning about wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
since there is no other solution to spend our time among wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and learn about them
rather
than zoos. It can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to increase our knowledge about them and avoid being harmful to them.

However
, there are more convincing arguments for why zoos should
be shut
down.
First
, zoos are not capable of protecting the large majority of species from
being haunted
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
due to the destruction of their habitat. In my eye, each
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
fund programs to avoid environmental destruction and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
be safe in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
habitat. They are the same as every free species that don’t deserve to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
behind bars for their entire
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. Their distress is obvious from walking over the cage all day long.
Moreover
, zoo
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are more likely to be there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
for the entertainment of visitors. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
zoos, they
are mistreated
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways, such as insufficient food and medical care and childish mischief of visitors that disturb their peaceful resting.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
should
be protected
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
zoos are not the proper protection they demand several reasons
besides
their cruelty to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
, not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
similarity to their national habitat, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
suffer outweighs the benefits of zoos.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
after all
, zoos should
be closed
down.
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IELTS essay Some people think that zoos are cruel and should be closed down. Others, however, believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
333 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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