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Some people believe that it is more important to teach children the literature of their own country than of other countries. Do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people believe that it is more important to teach children the literature of their own country than of other countries. v. 1
It is inclined to believe by some people that it is vital to teach children the story of their own country rather than others. I partly agree with this viewpoint. First and foremost, learning own country literature is essential for a human life. Each person should know about history well to use it for other purposes. So, one of them will feel the need in the case of choosing performance. Secondly, it is readily apparent that these days almost all students were obliged to study antiquity in universities. It becomes much circulated notion and in this way students become informed from our history. All in all, I hold the opinion that learning own history is a really beneficial and crucial subject nowadays. On the other hand, I also tend to think that it is not as essential as it mentioned because in this digital era a human was not owes to do thing which one does not like. In particular, it is the major reason not to study own history. Besides this, it is also possible that that learning or exploring another country literature is more important and will lead to a vast number of successes, rather than own history. In addition to, this phenomenon is much practiced and there are very few who will pay attention to such rules which exist in these days. To sum up, it is believed by many that learning own history is more important than of other countries. I guess that both overviews are true in half percent and a human should take into consideration and give some solution to this problem without any discussion.
It
is inclined
to believe by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that it is vital to teach children the story of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
rather
than others. I partly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this viewpoint.

First
and foremost,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
literature is essential for a human life. Each person should know about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
well to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
purposes.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, one of them will feel the need in the case of choosing performance.
Secondly
, it is
readily
apparent that these days almost all students
were obliged
to study antiquity in universities. It becomes much circulated notion and in this way students become informed from our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
. All in all, I hold the opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
is a
really
beneficial and crucial subject nowadays.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, I
also
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is not as essential as it mentioned
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
in this digital era a human was not owes to do thing which one does not like.
In particular
, it is the major reason not to study
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
.
Besides
this, it is
also
possible that that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
or exploring another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
literature is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and will lead to a vast number of successes,
rather
than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
.
In addition
to, this phenomenon is much practiced and there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
few who will pay attention to such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
which exist in these days.

To sum up, it
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. I guess that both overviews are true in half percent and a human should take into consideration and give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
solution to this problem without any discussion.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that it is more important to teach children the literature of their own country than of other countries. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
271 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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