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Some people believe that it is more important to teach children the literature and history of their own country rather than the literature and history of other countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.2

Some people believe that it is more important to teach children the literature and history of their own country rather than the literature and history of other countries. v. 2
People have different ideas about learning past events and the literature of their nation. I personally believe learning literature and history of their own country is as significant as learning history and literature of other nations. To begin with children are taught about their history and literature of their country they can learn where they live and born and by learning the past events and the culture of their country's sense of identity happens as a result of knowing their history and it gives a thematic sense of roots and belonging. For example, children who read poems of their countries can recognize great people and the ancestors of their country. Consequently, children can be more familiar with their own country by knowing more stories behind the nation through studying history and literature which showed patterns of behaviour or events in the past and their outcome which can help them avoid similar outcomes in the future. On the other viewpoints, learning other countries´ culture, it can vital nowadays because of growing technology and globalization people connect more with other people all over the world. In the other word, the level of communication and relationship between countries has increased internationally. For instance, travelling increase and people visit other countries such as French and German and children if want to migrate in the future should learn and study literature and values of other countries. This will make it easier for them to adapt in those countries. In conclusion, in my opinion learning history and culture of their county it can be more important. However, studying and teaching history and literature of other countries during this day because of changing people, s lifestyle is crucial.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
past
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literature
of their nation. I
personally
believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literature
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is as significant as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literature
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
nations.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are taught
about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literature
of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
they can learn where they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
and born and by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
the past
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
and the culture of their country's sense of identity happens
as a result
of knowing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
and it gives a thematic sense of roots and belonging.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who read poems of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can recognize great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and the ancestors of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can be more familiar with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
by knowing more stories behind the nation through studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literature
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
patterns of
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
in the past and their outcome which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them avoid similar outcomes in the future.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
viewpoints,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
Possible spelling mistake found.
countries´
culture, it
The word 'vital' is a noun or an adjective. A verb or adverb is missing or misspelled here, or maybe a comma is missing.
can vital
nowadays
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of growing technology and globalization
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
connect more with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
all over the world. In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
word, the level of communication and relationship between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
has increased
internationally
.
For instance
, travelling increase and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
visit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
such as French and German and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
if want to migrate in the future should learn and study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literature
and values of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. This will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it easier for them to adapt in those countries.

In conclusion
, in my opinion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
and culture of their county it can be more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.
However
, studying and teaching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literature
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
during this day
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of changing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, s lifestyle is crucial.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that it is more important to teach children the literature and history of their own country rather than the literature and history of other countries. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
281 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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