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Some people believe that giving longer prison sentences is the best way to reduce crime. Others believe that there are better ways to reduce crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion? v.2

Some people believe that giving longer prison sentences is the best way to reduce crime. Others believe that there are better ways to reduce crime. v. 2
To keep crime rate in control judgments should be given for the extra prison period. Although some others are against it, but some people are supporting. This essay will discuss both the point of views to reduce the offence. Firstly, this essay will discuss about how crime percentage can be lowered by keeping criminals in jail for a longer time and secondly, it will discuss the other possible better way to reduce crime rate other than longer periods of prison. I will give my opinion in the conclusion. Nowadays, the percentage of crime as been increasing rapidly day by day. So, most of the public is supporting to put the criminals under police control to reduce the rate of crime. Further more, if we put them in jail, they can't influence other people to become criminals and perform more crimes. On the other hand, if we give them freedom which may support them to do more offences. So that, by giving a long prison statement, we prison statement, we can have a better society. For example, in Australia crime rate is getting lower every year to 20% because they will be prisoned for more time. In contrast, few people support that there are many other possible recommended ways to reduce criminals. Prisoning for a long time will make them stay away from their families and society which leads to go down emotionally in order that, they don't have any scope to change and become a better person. For example, If we put them under proper doctors and give them better counselling it will help them to be a responsible person and make the society better. In conclusion, this essay supports the idea of longer prison will help the criminals to reduce the crimes, but I recommend that the government should also provide counsellings to criminals in prisons. So that, it will help the public to survive in crime free society.
To
keep
crime
rate
in control judgments should be
given
for the extra
prison
period. Although
some
others are against it,
but
some
people
are supporting. This essay will discuss both the point of views to
reduce
the
offence
.
Firstly
, this essay will
discuss about how
crime
percentage can
be lowered
by keeping
criminals
in jail for a longer time and
secondly
, it will discuss the
other
possible
better
way to
reduce
crime
rate
other
than longer periods of
prison
. I will give my opinion in the conclusion.

Nowadays, the percentage of
crime
as been increasing
rapidly
day by day.
So
, most of the public is supporting to put the
criminals
under police control to
reduce
the
rate
of
crime
.
Further
more, if we put them in jail, they can't influence
other
people
to become
criminals
and perform more
crimes
. On the
other
hand, if we give them freedom which may support them to do more
offences
.
So
that, by giving a long
prison
statement, we
prison
statement, we can have a
better
society
.
For example
, in Australia
crime
rate
is getting lower every year to 20%
because
they will be
prisoned
for more time.

In contrast
, few
people
support that there are
many
other
possible recommended
ways to
reduce
criminals
.
Prisoning
for a long time will
make
them stay away from their families and
society
which leads to go down
emotionally
in order that, they don't have any scope to
change
and become a
better
person.
For example
, If we put them under proper doctors and give them
better
counselling it will
help
them to be a responsible person and
make
the
society
better.

In conclusion
, this essay supports the
idea
of longer
prison
will
help
the
criminals
to
reduce
the
crimes
,
but
I recommend that the
government
should
also
provide
counsellings
to
criminals
in
prisons
.
So
that, it will
help
the public to survive in
crime
free
society
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
43Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Charlemagne

IELTS essay Some people believe that giving longer prison sentences is the best way to reduce crime. Others believe that there are better ways to reduce crime. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
320 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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