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Some people believe that computers are more a hindrance than a help in today's world. Others feel that they are such indispensable tools that they would not be able to live or work without them. •In what ways are computers a hindrance? •What is your opinion? v.4

Some people believe that computers are more a hindrance than a help in today's world. Others feel that they are such indispensable tools that they would not be able to live or work without them. •In what ways are computers a hindrance? •What is your opinion? v. 4
Nowadays, we use computers in many ways, either to work or at school. These computers have different advantages and disadvantages for us. Now I am going to compare the advantages and the disadvantages and in which ways are computers a hindrance then I will discuss my perspective. There is a vast plethora of ways in which computers are a hindrance. Firstly, Not only can it affect our vision, especially for youngsters, but it may also affect our backbone. That is to say that if someone stays on a computer for long, glare produced by the device will definitely affect our eyesight. Furthermore, computers may create an imaginary world around kids, especially if they are watching a movie. Without negotiation, They will stick to their seats silently from commercials to credits. Although it may seem beneficial for kids to stay quiet instead of playing and making a loud noise around, kids should play and pop this bubble to socialize with the outer community. In spite of the drastic negatives mentioned, one cannot turn a blind eye on the incontestable positives. Even though it has harmful effects on our health, it is the easiest way to collect data. However, these pieces of information should be checked, because sometimes websites are not officially accredited so data may be biased. For example, if you are doing a class project or watching an educational video on the internet, the first and the most salient advice to do is to check its resources to ensure that what you are collecting is as accurate as possible. In conclusion, I personally acquiesce that its merits outweigh its negatives. Notwithstanding that it is advised not to stay on the computer for more than two hours a day in order not to suffer from health problems and to ignite your communication skills.
Nowadays, we
use
computers in
many
ways
, either to work or at school. These computers have
different
advantages and disadvantages for us.
Now
I am going to compare the advantages and the disadvantages and in which
ways
are computers a hindrance then I will discuss my perspective.

There is a vast plethora of
ways
in which computers are a hindrance.
Firstly
, Not
only
can it affect our vision,
especially
for youngsters,
but
it may
also
affect our backbone.
That is
to say that if someone stays on a computer for long, glare produced by the device will definitely affect our eyesight.
Furthermore
, computers may create an imaginary world around kids,
especially
if they are watching a movie. Without negotiation, They will stick to their seats
silently
from commercials to credits. Although it may seem beneficial for kids to stay quiet
instead
of playing and making a loud noise around, kids should play and pop this bubble to socialize with the outer community.

In spite of
the drastic negatives mentioned, one cannot turn a blind eye on the incontestable positives.
Even though
it has harmful effects on our health, it is the easiest
way
to collect data.
However
, these pieces of information should be
checked
,
because
sometimes
websites are not
officially
accredited
so
data may
be biased
.
For example
, if you are doing a
class
project or watching an educational video on the internet, the
first
and the most salient advice to do is to
check
its resources to ensure that what you are collecting is as accurate as possible.

In conclusion
, I
personally
acquiesce that its merits outweigh its negatives. Notwithstanding that it
is advised
not to stay on the computer for more than two hours a day in order not to suffer from health problems and to ignite your communication
skills
.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that computers are more a hindrance than a help in today's world. Others feel that they are such indispensable tools that they would not be able to live or work without them. •In what ways are computers a hindrance? •What is your opinion? v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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