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Some people believe it is a good idea for students to work part-time to ensure better opportunities in future. Others are of the opinion, job during study distracts the individual. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Write at least 250 words. v.1

Some people believe it is a good idea for students to work part-time to ensure better opportunities in future. Others are of the opinion, job during study distracts the individual. v. 1
Nowadays, majority of students are choosing to work along with their studies. While some people assert that students who have a part-time employment would have increased career opportunities, others think that students should not be distracted from their learning by such part-time jobs. This essay will briefly elaborate on both of these ideas and explain how it is better for students to gain some work experience early on during studies. On one hand, most people worry about the distraction and the unnecessary stress that a job can bring to a student's life. It can be debated that most students struggle to maintain an adequate balance between their work and studies if they choose to get part-time employment, their attention diverts towards their job and they fail to maintain their grades at their respected universities. Some people think that it is too stressful for students to manage their jobs at the same time with their studies because of the never ending deadlines and assignments given by both their institutes and places of employment, especially when the start coinciding with each other. For example, a graduate student can be asked by the university to submit an educational paper by the end of the same week in which he has to submit a detailed report to his boss in the office, thereby it would be hard for him to cope with this stressful situation. On the other hand, students who choose to work while studying benefit extensively from their work experience than their peers who are unemployed. Working at a part-time job teaches these students valuable skills and lessons which can only be learnt in the practical world, furthermore, gaining some employment experience before graduation is often appreciated by prospective employers in the future. Hence, most university teachers encourage their students to enroll in various internship programs offered by different firms and offices. In addition to this advantage of part-time job, students also get the added benefit of earning money to pay for the increasingly expensive college educational programs. In conclusion of this essay, although students who have part-time jobs can get easily distracted from their studies and sometimes find it overwhelming to manage both work and studies at the same time, I still believe it is a good idea for them to do so as gaining some work experience beforehand proves to be beneficial to these student's professional careers ultimately in the future.
Nowadays,
majority of
students
are choosing to
work
along with their
studies
. While
some
people
assert that
students
who
have a part-time
employment
would have increased career opportunities, others
think
that
students
should not
be distracted
from their learning by such part-time
jobs
. This essay will
briefly
elaborate on both of these
ideas
and
explain
how it is better for
students
to gain
some
work
experience
early on during studies.

On one hand, most
people
worry about the distraction and the unnecessary
stress
that a
job
can bring to a student's life. It can
be debated
that most
students
struggle to maintain an adequate balance between their
work
and
studies
if they choose to
get
part-time
employment
, their attention diverts towards their
job and
they fail to maintain their grades at their respected universities.
Some
people
think
that it is too stressful for
students
to manage their
jobs
at the same time with their
studies
because
of the never ending deadlines and assignments
given
by both their institutes and places of
employment
,
especially
when the
start
coinciding with each other.
For example
, a graduate
student
can
be asked
by the university to submit an educational paper by the
end
of the same week in which he
has to
submit a detailed report to his boss in the office, thereby it would be
hard
for him to cope with this stressful situation.

On the other hand
,
students
who
choose to
work
while studying benefit
extensively
from their
work
experience
than their peers
who
are unemployed
. Working at a part-time
job
teaches these
students
valuable
skills
and lessons which can
only
be
learnt
in the practical world,
furthermore
, gaining
some
employment
experience
before
graduation is
often
appreciated by prospective employers in the future.
Hence
, most university teachers encourage their
students
to enroll in various internship programs offered by
different
firms and offices.
In addition
to this advantage of part-time
job
,
students
also
get
the
added
benefit of earning money to pay for the
increasingly
expensive college educational programs.

In conclusion
of this essay, although
students
who
have part-time
jobs
can
get
easily
distracted from their
studies
and
sometimes
find it overwhelming to manage both
work
and
studies
at the same time, I
still
believe it is a
good
idea
for them to do
so
as gaining
some
work
experience
beforehand proves to be beneficial to
these student
's professional careers
ultimately
in the future.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
43Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe it is a good idea for students to work part-time to ensure better opportunities in future. Others are of the opinion, job during study distracts the individual. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
401 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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