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some organisations believe that their employees should dress smartly. others value quality of work above appearance. v.2

some organisations believe that their employees should dress smartly. others value quality of work above appearance. v. 2
This essay is regarding the different organisation, which want their employees to wear smart formal clothes while some of them are interested only in the work of their workers. It is seen that few offices force their employees to wear formal clothes which they actually made compulsory. But in some organisation, its only important that the worker should come to work on time and complete his work in a given period of time. Some organisations feel that importance of wearing formal clothes is related to your personality. And it is proved that, when you work with smart looking people and in a good atmosphere, you try to stretch your ability to work and push yourself to achieve big goals. But some organisations think in the opposite way. They are simply interested in your work because they believe that clothes and your appearance do not matter if your work is neat and tidy. There believe is that, when all the employees work together without thinking of any other things, then work, will produce great output then others. I know a lady in my office wore a traditional saree instead of wearing formal clothes. Her salary, of half day was cut and she was scolded by a manager because of this. It degrades the moral of an employee when it comes to wearing, what others tell you to wear. He or she cannot perform up to the mark. In my opinion, wearing formal clothes is not important. But one should be neat, tidy and clean. Wearing smart cloths do not play vital role when you have to work with a bunch of people whose aim is to complete work and not look smart.
This essay is regarding the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
, which want their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
to wear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of them
are interested
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
of their workers.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that few offices force their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
to wear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
which they actually made compulsory.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
, its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
that the worker should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
on time and complete his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period of time.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
feel that importance of wearing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
is related
to your personality. And it
is proved
that, when you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
looking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
atmosphere, you try to stretch your ability to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and push yourself to achieve
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
goals.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
in the opposite way. They are
simply
interested in your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
and your appearance do not matter if your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is neat and tidy. There believe is that, when all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
together without thinking of any other things, then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, will produce great output then others.

I know a lady in my office wore a traditional saree
instead
of wearing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
. Her salary, of half day was
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
cut and
she
was scolded
by a manager
because of this
. It degrades the moral of an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to wearing, what others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
you to wear. He or she cannot perform up to the mark.

In my opinion, wearing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
one should be neat, tidy and clean. Wearing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cloths
do not play vital role when you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
with a bunch of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
whose aim is to complete
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and not look
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smart
.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
31Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay some organisations believe that their employees should dress smartly. others value quality of work above appearance. v. 2

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
281 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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