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some people argue that fashion ietms cost too much money. Others say that this is acceptable because fashion is an important part of life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.1

some people argue that fashion ietms cost too much money. Others say that this is acceptable because fashion is an important part of life. v. 1
Over the successive years, great care has been taken in the fashion world, and it has become the largest dominant in a large segment in the world, with different designs and strong competition among the companies producing them. Hence, we see that this difference and challenges between companies and factories cost a lot of money for designers and models, and advertising for their products. Which leads to the search for compensation for these things through customers that run and pursue the latest fashion nowadays. And all of this costs a lot of money, as customers pay huge sums for only a few fabrics in order to flaunt and excite the instinct of others who are rushing to buy the same products, and this is what international and local brands also depend on. Some people see fashion as not a basic need in life, and there is no reason to waste it. There are more essential needs than for life and scientific development. Others consider her part of their lives, as fashion makes her customers special among other people. But for me, I see this harmful because I am a low-income person and one who wears regular clothes of good quality and simple, casual design, where I used to wait for discounts and Black Friday days to pay a little and find my needs quickly. Now, with crazy designs that never suit me, it has become difficult for discounts are mostly on them, and I like it, its prices remain high, and I rarely find discounts on it, except for the poor quality in order to earn more profits.
Over the successive years, great care has
been taken
in the
fashion
world, and it has become the largest dominant in a large segment in the world, with
different
designs and strong competition among the
companies
producing them.

Hence
, we
see
that this difference and challenges between
companies
and factories cost
a lot of
money for designers and models, and advertising for their products. Which leads to the search for compensation for these things through customers that run and pursue the latest
fashion
nowadays.

And all of
this
costs
a lot of
money, as customers pay huge sums for
only
a few fabrics in order to flaunt and excite the instinct of others who are rushing to
buy
the same products, and this is what international and local brands
also
depend on.

Some
people
see
fashion
as not a basic need in life, and there is no reason to waste it. There are more essential needs than for life and scientific development. Others consider her part of their
lives
, as
fashion
makes
her customers special among other
people
.

But
for me, I
see
this harmful
because
I am a low-income person and one who wears regular clothes of
good
quality and simple, casual design, where I
used
to wait for discounts and Black Friday days to pay a
little
and find my needs
quickly
.
Now
, with crazy designs that never suit me, it has become difficult for discounts are
mostly
on them, and I like it, its prices remain high, and I rarely find discounts on it,
except for
the poor quality in order to earn more profits.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay some people argue that fashion ietms cost too much money. Others say that this is acceptable because fashion is an important part of life. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
268 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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