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Some parents think that children should not read books for entertainment. They should read only serious educational books. Give your opinion. v.1

Some parents think that children should not read books for entertainment. They should read only serious educational books. Give your opinion. v. 1
These days, a growing number of young parents determine to give birth later in life. This can be attributed to some reasons and some effects either positive or negative can be considered There are several reasons why a number of people want to have children later in life. First, since many young people are willing to pursue careers, delaying parenthood helps them have much more time to get more done, leading to greater success. Second, many young individuals understand the magnitude of children rearing responsibility, they in turn give birth later in life. In fact, taking care of children, either feeding or soothing babies are considered as a full-time job, which discourages many would-be parents. In addition, this choice allows them to have more time to spend on personal hobbies. For instance, it is easier for a young couple to travel when they do not have a baby to nurture Nevertheless, this tendency might bring about some negative effects on both family life and society. Fist, having children later will cause a significant age gap between two generations. In fact, it is harder for parents to understand and communicate with their offering. Second, by giving birth when they are too old, the babies being might be less physically healthy. This means that the future workforce might be affected if too many people decide to follow this trend. In conclusion, there are some reasons why many people prefer to have children later in life, and this tendency can result in some negative impacts on both family life and society
These days, a growing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
parents determine to give birth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
later
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. This can
be attributed
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
effects either
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
can be
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
considered


There are several reasons why a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
want to have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
later
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
First
, since
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are willing to pursue careers, delaying parenthood
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them have much more time to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more done, leading to greater success. Second,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
individuals understand the magnitude of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
rearing responsibility, they in turn give birth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
later
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. In fact, taking care of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, either feeding or soothing babies
are considered
as a full-time job, which discourages
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
would-be parents.
In addition
, this choice
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them to have more time to spend on personal hobbies.
For instance
, it is easier for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
couple to travel when they do not have a baby to
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
nurture


Nevertheless
, this tendency might bring about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects on both family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and society. Fist, having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
later
will cause a significant age gap between two generations. In fact, it is harder for parents to understand and communicate with their offering. Second, by giving birth when they are too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
, the babies being might be less
physically
healthy. This means that the future workforce might be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
if too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
decide to follow this trend.

In conclusion
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
later
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, and this tendency can result in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on both family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and society
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
The conquest of learning is achieved through the knowledge of languages.
Roger Bacon

IELTS essay Some parents think that children should not read books for entertainment. They should read only serious educational books. Give your opinion. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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