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Some organizations impose the rule of wearing a uniform in the workplace. Do you think that employees in certain organizations should wear a uniform? What is your viewpoint on this issue? v.2

Some organizations impose the rule of wearing a uniform in the workplace. Do you think that employees in certain organizations should wear a uniform? What is your viewpoint on this issue? v. 2
Many companies and organizations are making uniform necessary for their employees. Having a separate uniform for office is actually a good thing but there can be some disadvantages to that. Firstly, when a separate outfit is designed for an organization, it creates uniformity among their staffs. It becomes impossible to even predict who earns how much and who is at a higher post. Secondly, the employees are benefited by the fact that they do not have to worry about what to wear for office every morning. People often feel uncomfortable if they have to repeat same clothes every week. All the staffs of an office do not have a high earning. Those who can earn more can buy many clothes and change them daily whereas, those who do not earn more have to repeat the same number of clothes every week. This often makes low earners feel inferior to high earners. This may even disturb the working environment in the office as the employees seem to be uncomfortable with each other. Some low earning people even tend to buy clothes, sometimes, even more than they are supposed to, just to fit in with high earning staffs which could result in a bad economic state to some people. Thus, having an office uniform solves all such problems. People not only have to worry about buying new clothes and fitting in with the richer ones but also, can save their money for future rather than, wasting it in buying new outfits. However, there are some disadvantages too. As office uniform is specific, it is easier for anyone to identify where a particular person works. In addition, sometimes, people may have to go to a certain event after office. In that case, they cannot simply go to the event in their office uniform and they cannot even wear a different clothing item other than their uniform. Hence, they need to go home and get dressed for the event which consumes time. This will not be the case if there is not an office uniform. Employees can get dressed according to the event that they will be attending while going to their office and after office hours is complete they can straightly go the event that they are supposed to. To conclude, I believe office uniform is necessary for any office or organizations to bring uniformity among their staffs, however, they should be allowed to wear other casual attire if they will be attending other events after office.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and organizations are making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniform
necessary for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
. Having a separate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniform
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
is actually a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
thing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages to that.

Firstly
, when a separate outfit
is designed
for an organization, it creates uniformity among their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staffs
. It becomes impossible to even predict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
earns how much and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
is at a higher post.
Secondly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
are benefited
by the fact that they do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
worry about what to wear for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
every morning.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
feel uncomfortable if they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
repeat same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
every week. All the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staffs
of an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
do not have a high earning. Those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
can earn more can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
them daily whereas, those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
do not earn more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
repeat the same number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
every week. This
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
low earners feel inferior to high earners. This may even disturb the working environment in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
seem to be uncomfortable with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
low earning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
even tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
, even more than they
are supposed
to,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to fit in with high earning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staffs
which could result in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
economic state to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Thus
, having an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniform
solves all such problems.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
worry about buying new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
and fitting in with the richer ones
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
, can save their money for future
rather
than, wasting it in buying new outfits.

However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages too. As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniform
is specific, it is easier for anyone to identify where a particular person works.
In addition
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
may
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go to a certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
.
In that case
, they cannot
simply
go to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
uniform and
they cannot even wear a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
clothing item
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
than their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniform
.
Hence
, they need to go home and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
dressed for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
which consumes time. This will not be the case if there is not an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniform
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Employees
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
dressed according to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
that they will be attending while going to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
and after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
hours is complete they can
straightly
go the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
that they
are supposed
to.

To conclude
, I believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniform
is necessary for any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
or organizations to bring uniformity among their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
staffs
,
however
, they should be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to wear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
casual attire if they will be attending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
53Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some organizations impose the rule of wearing a uniform in the workplace. Do you think that employees in certain organizations should wear a uniform? What is your viewpoint on this issue? v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
414 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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