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Some organisations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion v.1

Some organisations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. 1
It is considered by some companies that it is better for their staffs to wear cleaverly, while there are some that believe that the well performace of their work plays a geater role. This essay discusses both side of this contentious argument and then I will give my own perspectiive. The main reason why some companies set certain dress code policy for their employees is because they want to increase or at least maintain the productive and efficient of their staffs. For example, people who work as nurses or street swipers, it would be very difficult and unconvenient for them to do jobs if they wear mini skirts or something too formal. In addition, another reason to support this view is related to the positive image of a company or a position. First image plays an essentional role for some companies or job poistions, for instance, when people choose a luxury hotel as an accommodation for the hoilday, they would not want to see receptionists wearing casual uniform, they expect the staffs wearing something more formal to show the high quality of service. For people who argue that the working quality of their employees is the only thing that matter is because they do not have to face their customers directly. To illustrate this, if some people who work in IT industry such as Google or IBM, the only thing that their boss or managers care is related to their creativity or if they can fix or repair customers problems which are normally related to the sofeware or machines. Moreover, for people who work in the fasion industry, to boost their creativity on designing clothes or items, wearing what ever they want is a way to help they to stimulate their extraordinary ideas. In conclusion, both sides of views have their own merits; however, on balance, I personaly value that the it is more important to wear cleaverly when people do their jobs. In my opinion, wear smartly is basic sense to respect your own job and with this positive attiute, your performance of work would not too low.
It
is considered
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
that it is better for their staffs to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
Possible spelling mistake found.
cleaverly
, while there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that believe that the well
Possible spelling mistake found.
performace
of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
plays a
Possible spelling mistake found.
geater
role. This essay discusses both side of this contentious argument and then I will give my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
Possible spelling mistake found.
perspectiive
.

The main reason why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
set certain dress code policy for their employees is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they want to increase or at least maintain the productive and efficient of their staffs.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as nurses or
Possible spelling mistake found.
street swipers
, it would be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult and
Possible spelling mistake found.
unconvenient
for them to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
if they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
mini skirts or something too formal.
In addition
, another reason to support this view
is related
to the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
image of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
or a position.
First
image plays an
Possible spelling mistake found.
essentional
role for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
Possible spelling mistake found.
poistions
,
for instance
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose a luxury hotel as
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "accommodation".
an accommodation
for the
Possible spelling mistake found.
hoilday
, they would not want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
receptionists wearing casual uniform, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
the staffs wearing something more formal to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the high quality of service.

For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
argue that the working quality of their employees is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
thing that matter is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
face their customers
directly
. To illustrate this, if
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in IT industry such as Google or IBM, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
thing that their boss or managers care
is related
to their creativity or if they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
or repair customers problems which are
normally
related to the
Possible spelling mistake found.
sofeware
or machines.
Moreover
, for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
fasion
industry, to boost their creativity on designing clothes or items, wearing what ever they want is a way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
they to stimulate their extraordinary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
.

In conclusion
, both sides of views have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
merits;
however
, on balance, I
Possible spelling mistake found.
personaly
value that
Possible typo. Did you mean "the" or "it"?
the it
is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
Possible spelling mistake found.
cleaverly
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
smartly
is basic sense to respect your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and with this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
Possible spelling mistake found.
attiute
, your performance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
would not too low.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
27Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Mistakes
Do you know what a foreign accent is? It’s a sign of bravery.
Amy Chua

IELTS essay Some organisations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
349 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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