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Some movies are serious, designed to make the audience think. other movies are designed primarily to amuse and entertain. which type of movie do you prefer? v.3

Some movies are serious, designed to make the audience think. other movies are designed primarily to amuse and entertain. which type of movie do you prefer? v. 3
These days, there is a growing trend of families moving to various foreign countries in search of work. Some people argue this could have negative impacts on children. However, I think moving abroad to work results in their children’s exposing to foreign education systems and cultures. From one side, a family moving abroad to work can cause some problems. First, taking children to other countries would have a negative impact on child psychology. To illustrate this, kids could take a long time to integrate into new environment and culture, since they have to leave their close friends and family members contributing to their loneliness and homesick. Second, learning new language could be the biggest barrier to them. When they go to school in a foreign country, they could not be able to keep up with academic and linguistic ability of their new classmates. When their ability to acquire knowledge is decreased due to the language barrier at the beginning, this would lead them to feel stressed and disappointed themselves. On the other hand, working overseas and taking all their children to live with could bring various benefits to them. For one thing, working abroad would offer them better working opportunity to earn money and raise their child better. As a result, their families’ living standards and monthly salary would be improved, especially for those living in undeveloped countries. Therefore, their children will have a better living condition to develop. In addition, going to another country assist their kids to have a better education system. For example, some Vietnamese people move to many developed countries, because the school curriculum will help their children to enhance their knowledge and skills completely. This leads their kids to having a better future career when they grow up. In conclusion, an increasing number of people migrating overseas to work are increasing these days, and they mostly bring their families to these countries. In my opinion, this contributes to more benefits to their children’s future if they can overcome the difficulties at the beginning.
These days, there is a growing trend of
families
moving to various foreign
countries
in search of
work
.
Some
people
argue this could have
negative
impacts on
children
.
However
, I
think
moving abroad to
work
results in their
children’s
exposing to foreign education systems and cultures.

From one side, a
family
moving abroad to
work
can cause
some
problems.
First
, taking
children
to other
countries
would have a
negative
impact on child psychology. To illustrate this, kids could take a long time to integrate into new environment and culture, since they
have to
leave
their close friends and
family
members contributing to their loneliness and homesick. Second, learning new language could be the biggest barrier to them. When they go to school in a foreign
country
, they could not be able to
keep
up with academic and linguistic ability of their new classmates. When their ability to acquire knowledge
is decreased
due to the language barrier at the beginning, this would lead them to feel
stressed
and disappointed themselves.

On the other hand
, working overseas and taking all their
children
to
live
with could bring various benefits to them. For one thing, working abroad would offer them
better
working opportunity to earn money and raise their child
better
.
As a result
, their
families’
living standards and monthly salary would be
improved
,
especially
for those living in undeveloped
countries
.
Therefore
, their
children
will have a
better
living condition to develop.
In addition
, going to another
country
assist their kids to have a
better
education system.
For example
,
some
Vietnamese
people
move
to
many
developed
countries
,
because
the school curriculum will
help
their
children
to enhance their knowledge and
skills
completely. This leads their kids to having a
better
future career when they grow up.

In conclusion
, an increasing number of
people
migrating overseas to
work
are increasing these days, and they
mostly
bring their
families
to these
countries
. In my opinion, this contributes to more benefits to their
children’s
future if they can overcome the difficulties at the beginning.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some movies are serious, designed to make the audience think. other movies are designed primarily to amuse and entertain. which type of movie do you prefer? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
338 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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