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Some countries sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good, while others think there are disadvantages to this. Discuss both sides and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from v.2

Some countries sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good, while others think there are disadvantages to this. 2
Since the beginning of capitalism period, governments have seen a rural exodus of citizens from the countryside to urban zones. The high geographic concentration of population, nonetheless, has had negative impacts on human welfare in major cities. This essay argues that the statistics are a consequence of lack of structure, and to tackle such reflex, specific public investments are necessary. The principal justification for the drop of living standards is the rapid, extensive, and unplanned city growth. As a consequence of the enormous number of vehicles and narrow streets, metropolitan area extension has been followed by daily heavy traffic. Additionally, air and sound pollution from private cars have also resulted in adverse effects to citizens’ health. For instance, according to studies conducted by the University of Bristol, asthma disease rates are forty percent superior in mega-cities in comparison to the majority of small towns. Therefore, the side effects on people’s mental and physical healthy decrease quality of life. Enhancing living condition rates require a genuine public effort. Firstly, public administration needs to invest in alternative transportation methods which include both public and environmentally-friendly options, such as electric trains and bike lanes. Secondly, the State should focus on sustainability. That means building more green spaces as well as reforesting damaged areas. To illustrate the positive effects that come from the transformations, comparing Toronto and New York, statistics reveal that while the first previous mentioned is on the top of livability rankings, the other one is barely among the first hundred. To conclude, this essay argued that the decline is mainly caused by the poor urban structure and the expressive number of residents. Thus, the investment in clean transports as well as train, buses, and subways could assist in the pollution rates. Moreover, public green areas could improve residents’ health and as a result, the well being of a whole community.
Since the beginning of capitalism period,
governments
have
seen
a rural exodus of citizens from the countryside to urban zones. The high geographic concentration of population, nonetheless, has had
negative
impacts on human welfare in major cities. This essay argues that the statistics are a consequence of lack of structure, and to tackle such reflex, specific
public
investments are necessary.

The principal justification for the drop of living standards is the rapid, extensive, and unplanned city growth. As a consequence of the enormous number of vehicles and narrow streets, metropolitan area extension has
been followed
by daily heavy traffic.
Additionally
, air and sound pollution from private cars have
also
resulted in adverse effects to citizens’ health.
For instance
, according to studies conducted by the University of Bristol, asthma disease rates are forty percent superior in mega-cities
in comparison
to the majority of
small
towns.
Therefore
, the side effects on
people
’s mental and physical healthy decrease quality of life.

Enhancing living condition rates require a genuine
public
effort.
Firstly
,
public
administration needs to invest in alternative transportation methods which include both
public
and
environmentally
-friendly options, such as electric trains and bike lanes.
Secondly
, the State should focus on sustainability. That means building more green spaces
as well
as reforesting damaged areas. To illustrate the
positive
effects that
come
from the transformations, comparing Toronto and New York, statistics reveal that while the
first
previous mentioned is on the top of livability rankings, the other one is
barely
among the
first
hundred.

To conclude
, this essay argued that the decline is
mainly
caused by the poor urban structure and the expressive number of residents.
Thus
, the investment in clean transports
as well
as train, buses, and subways could assist in the pollution rates.
Moreover
,
public
green areas could
improve
residents’ health and
as a result
, the
well being
of a whole community.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some countries sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good, while others think there are disadvantages to this. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
309 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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