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Some businesses now say that no-one can smoke cigarettes in any of their offices. Some governments have banned smoking in all public places. Do you agree or disagree with this? v.1

Some businesses now say that no-one can smoke cigarettes in any of their offices. Some governments have banned smoking in all public places. with this? v. 1
The importance and popularity of smoking area have grown over the past few years. Experts throughout developing and developed worlds have debated whether smoking in a public area should be restricted or not. Personally, i strongly advocate the former view. However, both sides of this issue will be examined in the following essay. On the one hand, there are three essential positive sides of banned smoking in public area. The most significant one would be a health issue. An extensive study by renowned university has illustrated that not only the smokers' health, but also the non-smokers' health will be deteriorated because non-smokers receive indirect impact. Furthermore, pollution has played an important role in our lives. One of the crucial cause results from smoke of cigarettes. Hence, the increase of global warming will harm both human life and wildlife, comparison this situation to the proverbial canary in the coal mine. Last but not least, cigarette is one type of addicted drug that would shorten the person's life. When the death rate from smoking rose, resulted in lack of country's labour and decrease the country's GDP. On the other hand, although there are ample benefits in restricted smoking area, its multifold disagreements cannot be denied. First and the foremost, deviation of smokers' rights is the often argument. Due to the fact that everyone has the right to do something, thus they will use this kind of claim to argue the agreement of banned smoking area. Another disagreement that should be taken into consideration is that nicotine - ingredient of cigarettes - would help to reduce the stress level from working hard. To conclude from aforementioned arguments, i obviously believe that its advantages in determining the smoking area would outweigh its disadvantages.
The importance and popularity of
smoking
area
have grown over the past few years. Experts throughout developing and developed worlds have debated whether
smoking
in a public
area
should
be restricted
or not.
Personally
,
i
strongly
advocate the former view.
However
, both sides of this issue will
be examined
in the following essay.

On the one hand, there are three essential
positive
sides of banned
smoking
in public
area
. The most significant one would be a health issue. An extensive study by renowned university has illustrated that not
only
the smokers' health,
but
also
the non-smokers' health will
be deteriorated
because
non-smokers receive indirect impact.
Furthermore
, pollution has played an
important
role in our
lives
. One of the crucial cause results from smoke of cigarettes.
Hence
, the increase of global warming will harm both human life and wildlife, comparison this situation to the proverbial canary in the coal mine. Last
but
not least, cigarette is one type of addicted drug that would shorten the person's life. When the death rate from
smoking
rose, resulted in lack of country's
labour
and decrease the country's GDP.

On the other hand
, although there are ample benefits in restricted
smoking
area
, its
multifold
disagreements cannot
be denied
.
First
and the foremost, deviation of smokers' rights is the
often
argument. Due to the fact that everyone has the right to do something,
thus
they will
use
this kind of claim to argue the agreement of banned
smoking
area
. Another disagreement that should
be taken
into consideration is that nicotine
-
ingredient of cigarettes
-
would
help
to
reduce
the
stress
level from working
hard
.

To conclude
from aforementioned arguments,
i
obviously
believe that its advantages in determining the
smoking
area
would outweigh its disadvantages.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
13Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay Some businesses now say that no-one can smoke cigarettes in any of their offices. Some governments have banned smoking in all public places. with this? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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