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Should a city try to preserve its old, historic buildings or destroy them and replace with modern buildings? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. v.1

Should a city try to preserve its old, historic buildings or destroy them and replace with modern buildings? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. v. 1
Owing to the hazard experienced by citizens in the world, due to the rise in the numbers of vehicles in the metropolis, a quantum of places have decided to restrict these cars from the major places in the city. In my opinion, I strongly agree that restrictions by enforced so that heavy traffic can reduce and health challenges can be curbed. Firstly, the ban on cars will cause a decrease in health and environmental challenges. In other words, the poisonous gas emitted from these cars will reduce, leading to protection of ozone layer, low cases of lung cancer and likely diseases. For instance, the National Environmental Agency in Ghana, reported that the volume if Carbon monoxide in the atmosphere has reduced from 70% in 2006 to 30% in 2010, when the government made a rule to address the private drivers. Another point to consider, is the fact that this law will ease movement. That is, people can get to their destinations easily and quickly because the amount of cars on the roads would have dropped. Consequently, there will be no gridlock and the havoc caused by this will be prevented. Problems such as missing appointments, losing businesses, tiredness and excess fund on fuel will all be halted. For example, after the embargo in the USA on own drivers in the cities, the citizens said they are better and get commendations from their employers for punctuality. In conclusion, the rule against private drivers on major roads will be effective in reducing health and environmental issues and improving movements.
Owing to the hazard experienced by citizens in the world, due to the rise in the numbers of vehicles in the metropolis, a quantum of places
have
decided to restrict these
cars
from the major places in the city. In my opinion, I
strongly
agree
that restrictions by enforced
so
that heavy traffic can
reduce
and health challenges can
be curbed
.

Firstly
, the ban on
cars
will cause a decrease in health and environmental challenges.
In other words
, the poisonous gas emitted from these
cars
will
reduce
, leading to protection of ozone layer, low cases of lung cancer and likely diseases.
For instance
, the National Environmental Agency in Ghana, reported that the volume if Carbon monoxide in the atmosphere has
reduced
from 70% in 2006 to 30% in 2010, when the
government
made a
rule
to address the private drivers.

Another point to consider, is the fact that this law will
ease
movement.
That is
,
people
can
get
to their destinations
easily
and
quickly
because
the amount of
cars
on the roads would have dropped.
Consequently
, there will be no gridlock and the havoc caused by this will be
prevented
. Problems such as missing appointments, losing businesses, tiredness and excess fund on fuel will all
be halted
.
For example
, after the embargo in the USA on
own
drivers in the cities, the citizens said they are better and
get
commendations from their employers for punctuality.

In conclusion
, the
rule
against private drivers on major roads will be effective in reducing health and environmental issues and improving movements.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Should a city try to preserve its old, historic buildings or destroy them and replace with modern buildings? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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