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Should a city try to preserve its old, historic building or destroy them and replace them with modern building? v.2

Should a city try to preserve its old, historic building or destroy them and replace them with modern building? v. 2
Modernization has resulted in rapid expansion of cities, which has left its heritage and culture behind. Day in day out new commercial complexes and other buildings are coming up in the place of older buildings. Sometimes historically significant building have been demolished to build new structures. Bearing this fact in mind a question that is a matter of debate a controversial one is whether a city should keep its old fashion houses and building or replace them by modern structures. Agreement is yet to be reached on this issue; however, I am personally on the belief that historic buildings are infrastructures of every city, which destroy them can destroy tissue of city. In the following paragraph, I will pinpoint the most outstanding reasons. One compelling reason, lending credence to the stance taken above is that we all know that old fashion building play a pivotal role in identity of city. Therefore, there are vast majorities of paramount information behind them, which can be effective in order to identify history of the town. Scientifically speaking, in all around the world there are many historical cities, which old structures consist their tissue and known as heritage of past generation. In fact, not only are this heritage valuable for people but also many traditions and customs are behind them that can patronize people to learn about their previous generations. Delving further into the issue reveal that our history is our knowledge and power without which or lives seems to be paralyzed. Indeed, not only should we preserve historical building and restore them but also should respect to them. A noteworthy refreshingly intelligible statistic revealed by recent social research conducted in our country; show that cities which preserved their historical places such as building, not only do provided their people with a great opportunity to understand their generation but also adds to the beauty of the city. Another reason that is equally important if not more is that preserving historical structures not only can attract tourists but also can develop economical situation. Broadly speaking, crowds of people in all corner of world are interested in traditional structures and make an effort to get acquaintance with various culture from past generation. Indeed, historical places provide fertile ground for tourists to get familiar with history. To put it in other word, tourists not only can improve the importance of heritage of a city but also can improve economic with substantial amount of money they spend. However, what I alluded to above cannot be overgeneralized to all contexts. Alongside with the innumerable benefits it has, indisputably, nowadays with the expansion of population, people need more space. In fact, preserving traditional houses may run people into a huge problems especially during earthquake. As a matter of fact building modern structures not only can meet people' s needs but also can improve the view of city with imposing structures. Nevertheless, it does not make those preceding benefits pale. To wrap it up, there are many different view point when it comes to preserving old-fashion house or not. Contemplating all the aforementioned reason one soon realize that many useful information are behind the historic structures, which can help people understand themselves better. Additionally, traditional structures can appeal crowds of tourists to the city and develop economic condition. I highly suggest that we should try to save our historical places because of many advantages they have. If we do not reverse such a trend, we will soon lose our originality and authenticity.
Modernization has resulted in rapid expansion of
cities
, which has
left
its
heritage
and culture behind. Day in day out new commercial complexes and other
buildings
are coming up in the
place
of older
buildings
.
Sometimes
historically
significant
building
have
been demolished
to build new
structures
. Bearing this
fact
in mind a question
that is
a matter of debate a controversial one is whether a city should
keep
its
old
fashion
houses
and
building
or replace them by modern
structures
. Agreement is
yet
to
be reached
on this issue;
however
, I am
personally
on the belief that historic
buildings
are infrastructures of every city, which
destroy
them can
destroy
tissue of city. In the following paragraph, I will pinpoint the most outstanding reasons.

One compelling reason, lending credence to the stance taken above is that we all know that
old
fashion
building
play a pivotal role in identity of city.
Therefore
, there are vast majorities of paramount information behind them, which can be effective in order to identify history of the town.
Scientifically
speaking, in all around the world there are
many
historical
cities
, which
old
structures
consist their tissue and known as
heritage
of past generation. In
fact
, not
only
are this
heritage
valuable for
people
but
also
many
traditions and customs are behind them that can patronize
people
to learn about their previous generations. Delving
further
into the issue reveal that our history is our knowledge and power without which or
lives
seems to
be paralyzed
.
Indeed
, not
only
should we preserve
historical
building
and restore them
but
also
should respect to them. A noteworthy
refreshingly
intelligible statistic revealed by recent social research conducted in our country;
show
that
cities
which preserved their
historical
places
such as
building
, not
only
do provided their
people
with a great opportunity to understand their generation
but
also
adds
to the beauty of the city.

Another reason
that is
equally
important
if not more is that preserving
historical
structures
not
only
can attract
tourists
but
also
can develop
economical
situation.
Broadly
speaking, crowds of
people
in all corner of world
are interested
in traditional
structures
and
make
an effort to
get
acquaintance with various culture from past generation.
Indeed
,
historical
places
provide fertile ground for
tourists
to
get
familiar with history. To put it in other word,
tourists
not
only
can
improve
the importance of
heritage
of a city
but
also
can
improve
economic with substantial amount of money they spend.
However
, what I alluded to above cannot
be overgeneralized
to all contexts. Alongside with the innumerable benefits it has,
indisputably
, nowadays with the expansion of population,
people
need more space. In
fact
, preserving traditional
houses
may run
people
into a huge
problems
especially
during earthquake. As a matter of
fact
building
modern
structures
not
only
can
meet
people&
#039; s needs
but
also
can
improve
the view of city with imposing
structures
.
Nevertheless
, it does not
make
those preceding benefits pale.

To wrap it up, there are
many
different
view point when it
comes
to preserving
old
-fashion
house
or not. Contemplating all the aforementioned reason one
soon
realize that
many useful information
are behind the historic
structures
, which can
help
people
understand themselves better.
Additionally
, traditional
structures
can appeal crowds of
tourists
to the city and develop economic condition. I
highly
suggest that we should try to save our
historical
places
because
of
many
advantages they have. If we do not reverse such a trend, we will
soon
lose our originality and authenticity.
26Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
57Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
The limits of my language are the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay Should a city try to preserve its old, historic building or destroy them and replace them with modern building? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
581 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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