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Several languages are in danger of extinction because they are spoken by very small numbers of people. Some people say that governments should spend public money on saving these languages, while others believe that would be a waste of money. v.17

Several languages are in danger of extinction because they are spoken by very small numbers of people. Some people say that governments should spend public money on saving these languages, while others believe that would be a waste of money. v. 17
Some languages are in the phase of extinction due to the low population of the speakers. A group of people believe that governments should allocate some budget to preserve these languages, but others think that it would not be effective and efficient. The following essay will discuss both opinions, but I believe that maintaining the diversity of languages is an important thing. On the one hand, some people believe that spending public money for protecting minority languages is a waste of money and time. The cost of maintaining the languages would be expensive since, there are only a small number of people who speak the languages, and many young people would refuse in learning and speaking in these languages as well. They believe that the money could be allocated for other important matters such as education, public transport and health. On the other hand, many people believe that it is necessary for governments to preserve the existence of minority languages. Every nation has its own traditional languages which are spoken by their ancestor and descendants, and they have been passing through for many generations. There are a lot of myths, legends, traditional and cultural activities which are passing over to the next generation using these languages, as many tribes have no written literature. And if these languages do extinct, then it means that many nations will lose their precious historical cultures. Therefore it is important for governments to take some efforts in maintaining minority languages, though the cost of preserving them might be considered as expensive. In conclusion, it is a fact that several languages in the world are in the phase of extinction. Some people suggest that governments should provide some fund for preserving these languages since they are inherited from the ancestors. Others think that the act is a waste of money as it has not economic benefits. Though both views have their own positive sides, I personally believe that people should protect the diversity of languages.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
are in the phase of extinction due to the low population of the speakers. A group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
should allocate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
budget to preserve these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it would not be effective and efficient. The following essay will discuss both opinions,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that maintaining the diversity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
thing.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that spending public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for protecting minority
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
is a waste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
and time. The cost of maintaining the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
would be expensive since, there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who speak the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would refuse in learning and speaking in these
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languages
as well
. They
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believe
that the
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money
could
be allocated
for
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other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
matters such as education, public transport and health.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that it is necessary for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
to preserve the existence of minority
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
. Every nation has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
which
are spoken
by their ancestor and descendants, and they have been passing through for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
generations. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
myths, legends, traditional and cultural activities which are passing over to the
next
generation using these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
, as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
tribes have no written literature. And if these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
do extinct, then it means that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
nations will lose their precious historical cultures.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
to take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
efforts in maintaining minority
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
, though the cost of preserving them might
be considered
as expensive.

In conclusion
, it is a fact that several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
in the world are in the phase of extinction.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
suggest that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
should provide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fund for preserving these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
since they
are inherited
from the ancestors. Others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the act is a waste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
as it has not economic benefits. Though both views have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
sides, I
personally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should protect the diversity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
38Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Several languages are in danger of extinction because they are spoken by very small numbers of people. Some people say that governments should spend public money on saving these languages, while others believe that would be a waste of money. v. 17

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
329 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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