Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? v.17

Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. with this opinion? v. 17
Maybe everybody has experienced that they have to pay more in comparison to local people to enter a museum or zoo. For some people, it can be acceptable while others may dislike it very much. Some people advocate it while others may object it. In this essay, I will try to put myself in the position of both groups and discuss the cons and pros of each option. Firstly, when the foreign visitors pay more for a cultural and historical attraction, it will bring more income and economic benefits for the owners of that attraction (that city, country etc. ). Further, the more money is gathered through the attraction, the more service the provider can give to the tourists. They can use the money to improve the facilities offered to the tourists like translations in several languages, brochures, headphones (for listening translation). Moreover, they can educate local people about the attraction and hire them as tourist guides to assist visitors to offer a better understanding of that attraction. On the other side, those who disagree with this opinion may say that this discrimination (that tourists must pay more than local people) may lead to a misunderstanding and they (the tourists) may think that the system is abusing them. This feeling of abusing may result in dissatisfaction and reduction in the number of tourists. Moreover, the less amount of tourist, the less income will be brought to the attraction. For instance, The British National Museum is free for everybody to enter while the Louvre Museum in Paris costs a lot of money for visitors to enter, and both have a lot of visitors each year. I believe that the staff of each attraction must calculate the benefits and drawbacks of each measure (price difference in this case) and evaluate the consequences. To conclude, it is difficult to suggest "the golden solution" which will work out for every attraction.
Maybe everybody has experienced that they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay more
in comparison
to local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to enter a museum or zoo. For
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, it can be acceptable while others may dislike it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
advocate it while others may object it. In this essay, I will try to put myself in the position of both groups and discuss the cons and pros of each option.

Firstly
, when the foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
pay more for a cultural and historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attraction
, it will bring more income and economic benefits for the owners of that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attraction
(that city, country etc.
Don't put a space before the closing parenthesis
)
.
Further
, the more money
is gathered
through the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attraction
, the more service the provider can give to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
. They can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the facilities offered to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
like translations in several languages, brochures, headphones (for listening translation).
Moreover
, they can educate local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attraction
and hire them as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
guides to assist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
to offer a better understanding of that attraction.

On the other side, those who disagree with this opinion may say that this discrimination (that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
pay more than local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people)
may lead to a
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
misunderstanding and
they (the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists)
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the system is abusing them. This feeling of abusing may result in dissatisfaction and reduction in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
.
Moreover
, the less amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
, the less income will
be brought
to the attraction.

For instance
, The British National Museum is free for everybody to enter while the Louvre Museum in Paris costs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
money for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
to enter, and both have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
each year. I believe that the staff of each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attraction
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
calculate the benefits and drawbacks of each measure (price difference
in this case
) and evaluate the consequences.
To conclude
, it is difficult to suggest
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
the golden solution
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
which will work out for every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
attraction
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. with this opinion? v. 17

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
317 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts