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School is planning to change the cafeteria’s menu with aims of offering healthier, low-calorie foods. Describe the advantage and disadvantage. v.1

School is planning to change the cafeteria’s menu with aims of offering healthier, low-calorie foods. Describe the advantage and disadvantage. v. 1
Forests have a role to play in fresh oxygen production and regulation of climate, however the forestation is decreasing the scale of places which are covered by the forests. There seem to be various factors which are responsible for the above situation, and a number of impacts, which we will outline here. A wide range of factors contributes to the destruction of forests. Possibly the root cause is logging trees illegally. Every year, to make sure that there is a balance between new cultivated trees and cut down ones, the authorities impose strict rules on the number of trees that can be cut by the registered companies. However, many of these companies and the unregistered companies cut down trees more that they are allowed. As a result, the number of cut trees would exceed the number of young trees. Besides, this imposed imbalance would affect the land because the green spaces would not be enough to maintain soil in these areas. Perhaps the second key origin is the human overpopulation. The number of people on the earth is inclining each year and this means that more people have to make their end meets such as housing. Although there are usually affordable houses in towns and cities, a considerable number of people living in the areas near forests prefer to stay there. To build new houses, they need places which are occupied by the forests. This would lessen the number of trees and enhance the rate of destroying forests. However, deforestation might bring about a number of negative effects. The most serious negative consequence could be air pollution. Since the forests act as the lung of the earth, deforestation can have a detrimental effect on our atmosphere due to hurting this vital organ of our planet. In other words, the forests absorb CO2, which is produced mostly by the human activities and produce O2 which is crucial for all creatures. Deforestation may impair balance between absorption of CO2 and production of O2 in favour of CO2 and therefore, worse the condition of atmosphere by increasing the amount of pollutants like CO2 in air. Perhaps the other major impact is exacerbating the climate change. Anything that is able to change atmosphere would alter the climate change. Regarding negative consequences of deforestation on quality of air, we can conclude that it exacerbates the climate change which is one of the serious issues. By the way of conclusion, the causes of the destruction of forests are primarily to do with logging trees illegally and overpopulation, and the effects are felt in terms of exacerbating the climate change and air pollution.
Forests
have a role to play in fresh oxygen production and regulation of
climate
,
however
the forestation is decreasing the scale of places which
are covered
by the
forests
. There seem to be various factors which are responsible for the above situation, and a
number
of impacts, which we will outline here.

A wide range of factors contributes to the destruction of
forests
.
Possibly
the root cause is logging
trees
illegally
. Every year, to
make
sure that there is a balance between new cultivated
trees
and
cut
down ones, the authorities impose strict
rules
on the
number
of
trees
that can be
cut
by the registered
companies
.
However
,
many
of these
companies
and the unregistered
companies
cut
down
trees
more that they are
allowed
.
As a result
, the
number
of
cut
trees
would exceed the
number
of young
trees
.
Besides
, this imposed imbalance would affect the land
because
the green spaces would not be
enough
to maintain soil in these areas. Perhaps the second key origin is the human overpopulation. The
number
of
people
on the earth is inclining each year and this means that more
people
have to
make
their
end
meets such as housing. Although there are
usually
affordable
houses
in towns and cities, a considerable
number
of
people
living in the areas near
forests
prefer to stay there. To build new
houses
, they need places which
are occupied
by the
forests
. This would lessen the
number
of
trees
and enhance the rate of destroying forests.

However
,
deforestation
might bring about a
number
of
negative
effects. The most serious
negative
consequence could be
air
pollution. Since the
forests
act as the lung of the earth,
deforestation
can have a detrimental effect on our atmosphere due to hurting this vital organ of our planet.
In other words
, the
forests
absorb CO2, which
is produced
mostly
by the human activities and produce O2 which is crucial for all creatures.
Deforestation
may impair balance between absorption of CO2 and production of O2 in
favour
of CO2 and
therefore
, worse the condition of atmosphere by increasing the amount of pollutants like CO2 in
air
. Perhaps the other major impact is exacerbating the
climate
change
. Anything
that is
able to
change
atmosphere would alter the
climate
change
. Regarding
negative
consequences of
deforestation
on quality of
air
, we can conclude that it exacerbates the
climate
change
which is one of the serious issues.

By the way of conclusion, the causes of the destruction of
forests
are
primarily
to do with logging
trees
illegally
and overpopulation, and the effects
are felt
in terms of exacerbating the
climate
change
and
air
pollution.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
If we spoke a different language, we would perceive a somewhat different world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay School is planning to change the cafeteria’s menu with aims of offering healthier, low-calorie foods. Describe the advantage and disadvantage. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
436 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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