Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Rich countries should allow jobs for skilled and knowledgeable employees who are from poor countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.3

Rich countries should allow jobs for skilled and knowledgeable employees who are from poor countries. v. 3
The 20th century has witnessed many advancements such as Globalisation, Urbanisation and IT revolution. As a result of these developments, people already started migrating among countries because of jobs and education which resulted in diminishing of the national boundaries to a larger extent. While the poor nations are still struggling with basic amenities, the wealthy and established nations namely US, UK has abundant resources to employee talented individuals from underdeveloped sections of the globe. Some critics assert that affluent countries should employee local manpower; however I completely agree that equal opportunities should be given to all talented job seekers even if they are from the poor nations. Firstly, the younger population from poor countries are already moving to developed nations for education so their knowledge is already at par with students of the developed nations. Besides this, the growth rate of the developed countries is very low since last 15 years so they are struggling with young productive work force. A good illustration of this is Japan, being a developed nation where young productive population is declining so they already allowed workforce from nations like Bangladesh and India to support their growth which in turn is a win-2 situation for both of the nations and individuals. Secondly, since people will start earning money through the global employment, so it will bolster peace and economic growth throughout the world. Poverty stricken poor countries will have money to improve their standard of living and will also be able to address basic problems like education and healthcare. Moreover, when there is pool of talented work force from the under developed nations, locals can learn and inculcate the best practises from the other countries and enhance their current systems. For example, the illiteracy rate in India has reduced drastically owing to people settling in US and Canada and these countries also got benefited by learning some of the best Indian practises such as Yoga. To conclude, the poor younger generation from the poor countries are well equipped with knowledge and education whereas the superior and established economies need more and more talented human resources to grow to next level. This type of support system from developed nations is conducive for the global peace and development.
The 20th century has witnessed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advancements such as
Possible spelling mistake. 'Globalisation' is British English.
Globalisation
,
Possible spelling mistake. 'Urbanisation' is British English.
Urbanisation
and IT revolution.
As a result
of these developments,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
already
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
migrating among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of jobs and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
which resulted in diminishing of the national boundaries to a larger extent. While the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
are
still
struggling with basic amenities, the wealthy and established
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
namely
US, UK has abundant resources to employee
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talented
individuals from underdeveloped sections of the globe.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
critics assert that affluent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should employee local manpower;
however
I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that equal opportunities should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talented
job seekers even if they are from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
nations.

Firstly
, the younger population from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
already
moving to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
their knowledge is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
already
at par with students of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
.
Besides
this, the growth rate of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
low since last 15 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they are struggling with young productive work force. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
illustration of this is Japan, being a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
where young productive population is declining
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
already
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
workforce from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
like Bangladesh and India to support their growth which in turn is a win-2 situation for both of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
and individuals.

Secondly
, since
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
earning money through the global employment,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it will bolster peace and economic growth throughout the world.
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Poverty stricken
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
will have money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their standard of living and will
also
be able to address basic problems like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and healthcare.
Moreover
, when there is pool of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talented
work force from the under
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
, locals can learn and inculcate the best
Possible spelling mistake. 'practises' is British English.
practises
from the other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and enhance their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
systems.
For example
, the illiteracy rate in India has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
drastically
owing to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
settling in US and Canada and these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
benefited by learning
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of the best Indian
Possible spelling mistake. 'practises' is British English.
practises
such as Yoga.

To conclude
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
younger generation from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well equipped
with knowledge and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
whereas the superior and established economies need more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talented
human resources to grow to
next
level. This type of support system from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
is conducive for the global peace and development.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
41Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
It is astonishing how much enjoyment one can get out of a language that one understands imperfectly.
Basil Lanneau Gildersleeve

IELTS essay Rich countries should allow jobs for skilled and knowledgeable employees who are from poor countries. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
371 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts