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Recently we are facing increasing number of cars, which poses a great threat to the pedestrians and cyclists. What’s more, a lot of parks need to be sacrificed as a result of the construction of railways and superhighways. Do you agree or disagree? Wha v.1

Recently we are facing increasing number of cars, which poses a great threat to the pedestrians and cyclists. What’s more, a lot of parks need to be sacrificed as a result of the construction of railways and superhighways. Wha v. 1
Some people are of the opinion that education is superior to prisons in combating crimes. From my perspective, while the use of prisons can be justified due to its role in barring criminals from society and deterring potential offenders, education is obviously a much better measure and therefore I completely agree with the statement. Incarceration has historically been acknowledged as a decent tool for exhibiting criminal justice and dissuading potential offenders. Drug trafficking, murder, money laundering, and other heinous crimes require regimented discipline, and prisons appear to be a good form of supervising criminals and isolating them from others. For those who have yet to commit crimes, many years of imprisonment and the dim prospects of having criminal records may serve as effective deterrents. However, education has been proven to have a more profound and long-lasting effect on tackling crimes. People who are properly educated have stronger mental health and heightened awareness of laws, which render them less criminally minded. In underdeveloped nations where a high proportion of citizens fail to undergo formal schooling, the crime rates are reported to be relatively high. In contrast, in countries where education is prioritized and well-funded, criminal activities have significantly plummeted to the point that several prisons are forced to be closed down. In conclusion, my firm conviction is that the act of incarcerating criminals might be efficient on a small scale, it is education that is of uttermost importance in ameliorating criminality. In the future, it is advisable that rather than wasting money on correctional facilities, more funding should be diverted towards education, especially early childhood education and development.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are of the opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is superior to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prisons
in combating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
. From my perspective, while the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prisons
can
be justified
due to its role in barring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
from society and deterring potential offenders,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is
obviously
a much better measure and
therefore
I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement.

Incarceration has
historically
been acknowledged
as a decent tool for exhibiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
justice and dissuading potential offenders. Drug trafficking, murder, money laundering, and other heinous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
require regimented discipline, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prisons
appear to be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
form of supervising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
and isolating them from others. For those who have
yet
to commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years of imprisonment and the dim prospects of having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
records may serve as effective deterrents.

However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
has
been proven
to have a more profound and long-lasting effect on tackling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
who are
properly
educated have stronger mental health and heightened awareness of laws, which render them less
criminally
minded. In underdeveloped nations where a high proportion of citizens fail to undergo formal schooling, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rates
are reported
to be
relatively
high.
In contrast
, in countries where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is prioritized
and well-funded,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
activities have
significantly
plummeted to the point that several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prisons
are forced
to
be closed
down.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
conclusion, my firm conviction is that the act of incarcerating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
might be efficient on a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
scale, it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
that is
of uttermost importance in ameliorating criminality.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
the future, it is advisable that
rather
than wasting money on correctional facilities, more funding should
be diverted
towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
,
especially
early childhood
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and development.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
We should learn languages because language is the only thing worth knowing even poorly.
Kató Lomb

IELTS essay Recently we are facing increasing number of cars, which poses a great threat to the pedestrians and cyclists. What’s more, a lot of parks need to be sacrificed as a result of the construction of railways and superhighways. Wha v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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