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Recently, it is common for people not to know their neighbours. What is the cause of the problem? What can be done to solve this problem. v.2

Recently, it is common for people not to know their neighbours. What is the cause of the problem? What can be done to solve this problem. v. 2
Nowadays, it is a normal phenomenon of not being familiar with the natives in the same locality due to the fast-paced and technology-driven world. To combat such a scenario, it is in the best interest to slow down a little bit, and to give machines a rest. To embark on, the ever-expanding and advancing universe has altered the way of living. Folks are mostly engrossed in their own world; consequently, one hardly acknowledges one’s neighbours. Either work or devices, such as mobiles, laptops, and television take up the whole day. One is left with a meager time to even take a sign of relief, forget about familiarizing with people in the vicinity. To exemplify, as per a report by a leading newspaper, 80% of the populace is engulfed in only earning bread and butter, which leaves an individual completely exhausted at the end of the day to even interact with the loved ones. To take charge of the situation, a break is the only requisite. Undeniably, monetary resources are the bedrock of life. However, relationships are equally imperative. Knowing neighbours aid in nurturing link; to survive in society, it is substantial. By working for only feasible hours and detaching from the tech-savy machinery for a while would be a fruitful solution. To quote an instance, as per a survey, masses indulged in work for a fixed period only are the happiest and have myriad time to invest in relations. To encapsulate, due to technological uplift and busy lifestyle, one rarely identifies folk in the neighbourhood. Stealing time away from the job and drifting apart from the gadgets and gizmos would bring life back on the track, rendering enough option to socialize with people.
Nowadays, it is a normal phenomenon of not being familiar with the natives in the same locality due to the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-paced and technology-driven world. To combat such a scenario, it is in the best interest to slow down a
Reduce redundancy by using "little" or "bit".
little bit
, and to give machines a rest.

To embark on, the ever-expanding and advancing universe has altered the way of living. Folks are
mostly
engrossed in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
world;
consequently
, one hardly acknowledges one’s
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
. Either work or devices, such as mobiles, laptops, and television take up the whole day. One is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
with a meager time to even take a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
of relief, forget about familiarizing with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in the vicinity. To exemplify, as per a report by a leading newspaper, 80% of the populace
is engulfed
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
earning bread and butter, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
an individual completely exhausted at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the day to even interact with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
ones.

To take charge of the situation, a break is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
requisite.
Undeniably
, monetary resources are the bedrock of life.
However
, relationships are
equally
imperative. Knowing
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbours' is British English.
neighbours
aid in nurturing link; to survive in society, it is substantial. By working for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
feasible hours and detaching from the
Possible spelling mistake found.
tech-savy
machinery for a while would be a fruitful solution. To quote an instance, as per a survey, masses indulged in work for a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
period
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
are the happiest and have myriad time to invest in relations.

To encapsulate, due to technological uplift and busy lifestyle, one rarely identifies folk in the
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbourhood' is British English.
neighbourhood
. Stealing time away from the job and drifting apart from the gadgets and gizmos would bring life back on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
, rendering
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
option to socialize with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Recently, it is common for people not to know their neighbours. What is the cause of the problem? What can be done to solve this problem. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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