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Question Some people think that strict punishment for driving offences are key to reducing traffic accident. Others however believe that other measures would improve road safety. Discuss both views and give your opinion v.1

Question Some people think that strict punishment for driving offences are key to reducing traffic accident. Others however believe that other measures would improve road safety. 1
Although, The rise and fall to traffic accidents is said to be dependent on compliance and non-compliance to traffic rules and regulations. Some proponents believe that strict penalties for driving offences will reduce traffic accidents. However, Others believe that other measures especially from government will go a long way in keeping people safe. Both arguments have valid points and I will discuss them now. on the one hand, every rebellion to the existing traffic rules attracts penalty. For instance failure to wear the seatbelt while driving attracts fine of 10000 Naira in Nigeria. In addition, speeding above the recommended speed limit on that particular road is dangerous for the driver and populace in that environment. Disobedience to this law attracts financial penalty or outright ban from driving for one year. Lastly, failure to recognise hazards on the roads can as well result in road traffic accidents. Therefore, it is highly imperative for the driver to take note of this or pay for the consequences. on the other hand, government should do the needful to ensure road safety. At first, traffic rules and regulations should be included in our secondary school curriculum. This is to educate the young ones early about the laws of driving and consequences that follow suit. Additionally, government should ensure adequate construction and maintenance of road because bad road is one of the contributing factor to road traffic accidents. Lastly, it is the responsibility of the government to install speed cameras on the road in order to register any violator. Reports have it for example that developed countries have low record of road traffic accidents, unlike developing nations that have high record. This is due to absence of speed cameras on the road in the third world countries. In conclusion, in my opinion, i think strict punishment to traffic offenders is not enough, government should also ensure other factors that contribute to traffic accident are taken care of.
Although, The rise and fall to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
is said
to be dependent on compliance and non-compliance to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
proponents believe that strict penalties for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
Possible spelling mistake. 'offences' is British English.
offences
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
.
However
, Others believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
measures
especially
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
will go a long way in keeping
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
safe. Both arguments have valid points and I will discuss them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
on
the one hand, every rebellion to the existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
attracts penalty.
For instance
failure to wear the seatbelt while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
attracts fine of 10000
Possible agreement error. The noun 'Naira' seems to be countable, so consider using: "nairas".
Naira
in Nigeria.
In addition
, speeding above the recommended speed limit on that particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
for the driver and populace in that environment. Disobedience to this law attracts financial penalty or outright ban from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
for one year.
Lastly
, failure to
Possible spelling mistake. 'recognise' is British English.
recognise
hazards on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
can
as well
result in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
.
Therefore
, it is
highly
imperative for the driver to take note of this or pay for the consequences.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
on
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should do the needful to ensure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
safety. At
first
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations should
be included
in our secondary school curriculum. This is to educate the young ones early about the laws of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
driving
and consequences that follow suit.
Additionally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should ensure adequate construction and maintenance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
is one of the contributing factor to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
.
Lastly
, it is the responsibility of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to install speed cameras on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
in order to register any violator. Reports have it
for example
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
have low record of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
, unlike developing nations that have high record. This is due to absence of speed cameras on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
in the third world countries.

In conclusion
, in my opinion,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
strict punishment to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
offenders is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
also
ensure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
factors that contribute to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accident
are taken
care of.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
38Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes
Language shapes the way we think, and determines what we can think about.
Benjamin Lee Whorf

IELTS essay Question Some people think that strict punishment for driving offences are key to reducing traffic accident. Others however believe that other measures would improve road safety. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
321 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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