Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Question 4: Explain sustainability by using the example of the printing company provided by the professor. v.1

Question 4: Explain sustainability by using the example of the printing company provided by the professor. v. 1
It is argued that pupils attaining great academic results should be honoured, while others are in favour of those who demonstrate general advancement. This essay suggests that the students achieving great academic results should be recognized. This essay will discuss both view points. Learning institutes praise hardworking students. They keep records of high achievers over a period of time and commend brilliant learners. Diligent work of smart pupils incentivized to motivate the learners strive to work harder and foster healthy education. For instance, the Ministry of education in Saudi Arabi rewards SR 3000 in cash for first three students who score the highest in the annual high school exam. This is to say, these rewards will have a positive impact on students and will motivate them to take part in other academic competitions. Alternatively, some are in favour of commending learners who improve over a term or academic year. They believe that this will encourage who are at the bottom of the class and will enhance their overall study. This essay disagrees with this viewpoint because it will introduce mediocrity and it is unfair to those who have worked hard to achieve academic distinction. As a result, learners will tend to be more dependant on their mentors for grading them and will show less improvement over time that will have adverse consequences for the learners themselves. For example, pupils who are not attentive to studies through our the year and just show little improvement over a term should not be rewarded. In conclusion, it is important to commend and reward hard working students and providing them an academic distinction rather than just recognizing students who are less attentive to foster healthy academic system.
It
is argued
that pupils attaining great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
results should be
Possible spelling mistake. 'honoured' is British English.
honoured
, while others are in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
demonstrate general advancement. This essay suggests that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
achieving great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
results should
be recognized
. This essay will discuss both view points.

Learning institutes praise hardworking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
records of high achievers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
a period of time and commend brilliant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learners
. Diligent work of smart pupils incentivized to motivate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learners
strive to work harder and foster healthy education.
For instance
, the Ministry of education in Saudi
Possible spelling mistake found.
Arabi
rewards SR 3000 in cash for
first
three
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
score the highest in the annual high school exam. This is to say, these rewards will have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and will motivate them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
competitions.

Alternatively
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
are in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of commending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learners
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
a term or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
year. They believe that this will encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are at the bottom of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
and will enhance their
overall
study. This essay disagrees with this viewpoint
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will introduce mediocrity and it is unfair to those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have worked
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to achieve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
distinction.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learners
will tend to be more
Did you mean "dependent" on?
dependant
on their mentors for grading them and will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
less improvement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
time that will have adverse consequences for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learners
themselves.
For example
, pupils
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are not attentive to studies through our the year and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
improvement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
a term should not
be rewarded
.

In conclusion
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to commend and reward
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
hard working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and providing them an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
distinction
rather
than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
recognizing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are less attentive to foster healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
system.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Question 4: Explain sustainability by using the example of the printing company provided by the professor. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts