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Q2 In many countries, the government practices the censorship of television programs. Do you support this practice or not? Give specific reason and examples to support your answer. v.1

Q2 In many countries, the government practices the censorship of television programs. Do you support this practice or not? Give specific reason and examples to support your answer. v. 1
It is believed by some populace that having friends who share the same thought as you is more important than a friend who has a differing opinion. In my opinion, I believe that having companions with an opposing viewpoint is better. On the one hand, some people believe that friendship with individuals that share a common view is better because there will be no room for commotion or conflict between the two parties thereby fostering unity. In other words, these two sets of people will be able to agree on ideas easily, without ending at loggerheads, and this will go a long way in preserving the friendship. For instance, in the recently publicized breakup of the partnership and friendship of "Warner Bros" who were three childhood friends, the major reason for the quarrel was because they had opposing perspectives concerning an issue that needed to be resolved. However, if they all had the same view, this would not have happened. On the other hand, other people believe that having friends who oppose your belief is recommended as this helps to gain new ideas thereby broadening your knowledge and I agree. Most times,   in the walk of life, we are faced with situations that needs fresh input or another perspective which is completely different from ours and the ability to get this viewpoint might be the key to solving the problem at hand, thus, having friends in your corner with different input will definitely go a long way in getting new ideas and increasing your thinking. For example, a Dallas policeman was in a dilemma as to how to resolve a murder case, he had tried all he could think of, however, after discussing the issue with his friend, he brought a new perspective to the case and they were able to unravel the murder and identify the culprit. In conclusion, although people's viewpoints may vary, I believe that having friends with different ideas will yield a better result than friends with the same ideas.
It
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
populace that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
share the same
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
as you is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
has a differing opinion. In my opinion, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
companions with an opposing viewpoint is better.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that friendship with individuals that share a common view is better
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there will be no room for commotion or conflict between the two parties thereby fostering unity.
In other words
, these two sets of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
easily
, without ending at loggerheads, and this will go a long way in preserving the friendship.
For instance
, in the recently publicized breakup of the partnership and friendship of
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Warner Bros
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
were three childhood
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
, the major reason for the quarrel was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they had opposing perspectives concerning an issue that needed to
be resolved
.
However
, if they all had the same view, this would not have happened.

On the other hand
, other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
oppose your belief
is recommended
as this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to gain new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
thereby broadening your knowledge and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
. Most times,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
in the walk of life, we
are faced
with situations that needs fresh input or another perspective which is completely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from ours and the ability to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
this viewpoint might be the key to solving the problem at hand,
thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
in your corner with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
input will definitely go a long way in getting new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
and increasing your thinking.
For example
, a Dallas policeman was in a dilemma as to how to resolve a murder case, he had tried all he could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
of,
however
, after discussing the issue with his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
, he brought a new perspective to the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
case and
they were able to unravel the murder and identify the culprit.

In conclusion
, although
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's viewpoints may vary, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
will yield a better result than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
with the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ideas
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Q2 In many countries, the government practices the censorship of television programs. Do you support this practice or not? Give specific reason and examples to support your answer. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
335 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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