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People who live in large cities face a range of problems in their daily life. What are the main problems people in cities face, and how can these problems be tackled? v.4

People who live in large cities face a range of problems in their daily life. What are the main problems people in cities face, and how can these problems be tackled? v. 4
It is commonplace in various parts of the world that an increasing number of people prefer to live in metropolitan areas for higher living standards. However, along with that, there emerge manifold problems that adversely affect such people in their diurnal life; and drastic measures should be taken to mitigate the consequences of such problems. One of the most conspicuous issues is overpopulation. Owing to the presence of numerous welfare merits regarding education, medical care and business in big cities, a vast number of people choose to migrate from rural areas to more developed ones, a trend that is also known as urbanization. This trend causes urban areas to become increasingly crammed, and, as a result, a great deal of issues therefrom are provoked, such as homelessness, traffic congestion, and higher crime rates. To combat those challenges, governments should consider long-term strategies to move city residents to less packed locations. A feasible option is to either build new satellite towns or enlarge metropolises by merging them with the suburbs or contiguous cities and relocate some universities, recreational centers, shopping malls, sports centers, and low-cost residential neighborhoods to such areas. Another deleterious feature that surrounds urbanites is air pollution. This primarily derives from their domestic activities that continually introduce harmful contaminants into the air, indirectly causing a range of respiratory health problems. For example, in keeping with the substantial numbers of citizens in cities, there remains excessive use of private vehicles, whereby emissions are extensively released into the atmosphere. To tackle this, there should be improvements in public transport systems to encourage more people to use it. In addition, it is essential that more trees be planted to absorb carbon dioxide and filter the air. To conclude, notwithstanding the undeniable benefits that city life offers, urbanites are encountering various troubles. Accordingly, governments need to take action to deal with them.
It is commonplace in various parts of the world that an increasing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in metropolitan areas for higher living standards.
However
, along with that, there emerge manifold problems that
adversely
affect such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in their diurnal life; and drastic measures should
be taken
to mitigate the consequences of such problems.

One of the most conspicuous issues is overpopulation. Owing to the presence of numerous welfare merits regarding education, medical care and business in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
, a vast number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose to migrate from rural areas to more developed ones, a trend
that is
also
known as urbanization. This trend causes urban areas to become
increasingly
crammed, and,
as a result
, a great deal of issues therefrom
are provoked
, such as homelessness, traffic congestion, and higher crime rates. To combat those challenges,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should consider long-term strategies to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
city residents to less packed locations. A feasible option is to either build new satellite towns or enlarge metropolises by merging them with the suburbs or contiguous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
and relocate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
universities, recreational centers, shopping malls, sports centers, and low-cost residential neighborhoods to such areas.

Another deleterious feature that surrounds urbanites is air pollution. This
primarily
derives from their domestic activities that
continually
introduce harmful contaminants into the air,
indirectly
causing a range of respiratory health problems.
For example
, in keeping with the substantial numbers of citizens in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
, there remains excessive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of private vehicles, whereby emissions are
extensively
released into the atmosphere. To tackle this, there should be improvements in public transport systems to encourage more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it.
In addition
, it is essential that more trees
be planted
to absorb carbon dioxide and filter the air.

To conclude
, notwithstanding the undeniable benefits that city life offers, urbanites are encountering various troubles.
Accordingly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
need to take action to deal with them.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
A foreign language is like a frail, delicate muscle. If you do not use it, it weakens.
Jhumpa Lahiri

IELTS essay People who live in large cities face a range of problems in their daily life. What are the main problems people in cities face, and how can these problems be tackled? v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
309 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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