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People today often use the internet to learn about the culture of other countries. This means that it is not that important to travel to those countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

People today often use the internet to learn about the culture of other countries. This means that it is not that important to travel to those countries. v. 1
At present, the folks are frequently using internet to gain knowledge regarding the culture of other states; therefore it is necessary to explore these countries. Conversely, I disagree with this assertion, and this essay will examine the reason why this is not viable according to me. Let us understand the reason why visiting countries is significant to know the culture. To begin with, enhancing communication is the most convenient matter. Where, the individuals are exploring different territories, and can make excellent relationship with people; as a result, they can build a strong bonding. Besides, improving knowledge is another positive point which cannot be disregarded as well. By travelling different states, the individuals can know about history, geography, and tradition. For instance, an international journal published a report that about 78% of brilliant learners were explored huge territories for their higher- studies. Although, it is said that the people can be achieved information about other countries cultures from the internet. Firstly, viewing traditional programs is the important matter for knowing culture. When the people enjoing other states show, they learn different history; so, they know various traditions. Nevertheless, I realize that sometime numerous fake information can publish in social media, hence, the people learn fake news. For example, the researchers are indicating that advertisement can change the history of a country. It is an irrefutable fact, that visiting places developing sense rather than surfing websites. To conclude, though exploring internet can cause a few puzzles; however, I assume that every person should travel many territories for enriching their knowledge.
At present, the folks are
frequently
using internet to gain knowledge regarding the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
of other states;
therefore
it is necessary to explore these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
Conversely
, I disagree with this assertion, and this essay will examine the reason why this is not viable according to me.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
us understand the reason why visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
is significant to know the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, enhancing communication is the most convenient matter. Where, the individuals are exploring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
territories, and can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
excellent relationship with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
;
as a result
, they can build a strong bonding.
Besides
, improving knowledge is another
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
point which cannot
be disregarded
as well
. By travelling
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
states, the individuals can know about history, geography, and tradition.
For instance
, an international journal published a report that about 78% of brilliant learners
were explored
huge territories for their higher- studies.

“Although” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Although
, it
is said
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
be achieved
information about other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
from the internet.
Firstly
, viewing traditional programs is the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
matter for knowing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
. When the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
enjoing
other states
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
, they learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
history;
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, they know various traditions.
Nevertheless
, I realize that sometime numerous fake information can publish in social media,
hence
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
learn fake news.
For example
, the researchers are indicating that advertisement can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the history of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. It is an irrefutable fact, that visiting places developing sense
rather
than surfing websites.

To conclude
, though exploring internet can cause a few puzzles;
however
, I assume that every person should travel
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
territories for enriching their knowledge.
16Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay People today often use the internet to learn about the culture of other countries. This means that it is not that important to travel to those countries. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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