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People sleep less than before in many countries. Why do people sleep less? What effect does it have on an individually and on society? v.14

People sleep less than before in many countries. Why do people sleep less? What effect does it have on an individually and on society? v. 14
In the modern era, insomnia is one of the major problems faced by the workers and non-workers. Before some decades, we never hear about this randomly in the society, but todays all work places sleep disorder is the common problem. In this essay, I will examine about the real facts behind this dangerous phenomenon. To begin with, the job market in the world drastically got down and employment ration fall down which we have never seen before due to the digital life, many products vanished from the market and replaced high technology products, like Mobile phone. Therefore, the lowest employment rate made a trend which is that those who want to earn more money supposed to work long hours or shift duties and work pressure increased compared to past job markets. On the other hand, most of the place’s computers are an unavoidable thing and those who are working for long hours they could have been facing the disorders in the sleep. Secondly, people lifestyle got changed due to this modern technology and most of them are leading an individual lifestyle. Subsequently, they spend their night in the social media via mobile phone or laptop and this also results sleepless night. In addition, morning hours they will not fresh and their attitude become anxiety, hallucination and short temper. As a result, happiness will be so far from this lifestyle and they will be more interested in drugs or alcohol in order to get recharged. Nowadays, young children are part of the crimes and parents do not have any control over it. To conclude, Insomnia makes people become ‘Zombies’ and upcoming future the scale will get increased. Hence, everybody must understand the purpose of human life and should start awareness about this dangerous disaster.
In the modern era, insomnia is one of the major problems faced by the workers and non-workers.
Before
some
decades, we never hear about this
randomly
in the society,
but
todays
all work places sleep disorder is the common problem. In this essay, I will examine about the real facts behind this
dangerous
phenomenon.

To
begin
with, the job market in the world
drastically
got
down and employment ration fall down which we have never
seen
before
due to the digital life,
many
products vanished from the market and replaced high technology products, like Mobile phone.
Therefore
, the lowest employment rate made a trend which is that those who want to earn more money supposed to work long hours or shift duties and work pressure increased compared to past job markets.
On the other hand
, most of the place’s computers are an unavoidable thing and those who are working for long hours they could have been facing the disorders in the sleep.

Secondly
,
people
lifestyle
got
changed
due to this modern technology and most of them are leading an individual lifestyle.
Subsequently
, they spend their night in the social media via mobile phone or laptop and this
also
results sleepless night.
In addition
, morning hours they
will not fresh
and their attitude become anxiety, hallucination and short temper.
As a result
, happiness will be
so
far from this
lifestyle and
they will be more interested in drugs or alcohol in order to
get
recharged. Nowadays, young children are part of the crimes and parents do not have any control over it.

To conclude
, Insomnia
makes
people
become ‘Zombies’ and upcoming future the scale will
get
increased.
Hence
, everybody
must
understand the purpose of human life and should
start
awareness about this
dangerous
disaster.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay People sleep less than before in many countries. Why do people sleep less? What effect does it have on an individually and on society? v. 14

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
293 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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