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People often do not interact with their neighbours and this is harming community building what are the possible causes and solutions v.1

People often do not interact with their neighbours and this is harming community building what are the possible causes and solutions v. 1
IN THIS CONTEMPORARY ERA, SCIENCE AND TECHNOLOGY ARE MORE VALUED THAN MUSIC AND ART. IN MY OPINION, EQUAL IMPORTANCE MUST BE GIVEN TO SPECIALISTS OF BOTH DOMAIN. ADVANCEMENT IN AUTOMATION HAS PRODUCED COMFORT IN HUMAN LIFE. HOWEVER, INNOVATIVE IDEAS AND NEW EXPERIMENTS ARE STILL NEEDED IN THIS FIELD. THEREFORE, THIS SPECIALITY MUST BE HIGHLY VALUED. AS AN ILLUSTRATION, OWING TO SCARCITY OF, IT EXPERTS IN PAKISTAN, FEW NATIONAL EXPERTS WERE OFFERED HIGH INCOME TO REVOLUTIONIZE IT SECTOR. IN ADDITION, SCIENTISTS DESRVE RESPECT AND HIGH STATUS IN SOCIETY, AS THEY DEVOTE MAJOR PROPORTION OF THEIR LIFE TO THE BETTERMENT OF MANKIND. FOR INSTANCE, SCIENTISTS SPEND MANY MONTHS IN SPACE, LIVING APART FROM THEIR FAMILY TO EXPLORE AND TO ACQUIRE KNOWLEDGE SPACE TO GLORIFY AND TO CREATE EASE IN HUMAN POPULATION. THEREFORE, IT IS VITAL TO CONSIDER PEOPLE FROM SUCH AREAS, IMPORTANT. ALTHOUGH MODERN SOCIETY WELCOME AND VALUE SPECIALISTS FROM SCIENCE AND TECHNOLOGY, THE HARDWORK OF MUSICIANS AND ARTISTS CAN NOT BE DENIED. AS THEY COMFORT HUMAN SOUL BY PRODUCING POSITIVE IMPACT ON SPIRITUAL LEVEL. TO ILLUSTRATE, STATISTICS REVELEAD, DUE TO THE PLEASING SOUND OF VARIOUS INSTRUMENTS, A MAJOR IMPROVEMENT WAS NOT IN PSYCHIATRIC PATIENTS. FURTHERMORE, ART CREATES AWARNESS AMONG MASSES AS IT IS THE EFFECTIVE WAY TO CONVEY YOUR MESSAGE THROUGH CREATIVITY. IN OTHER WORDS, SHARMEEN, A NOBLE PRIZE WINNER, FROM PAKISTAN, PORTRAYED THE POSITIVE IMAGE OF WOMEN AND HIGHLIGHTED THE DOMISTIC VIOLENCE ISSUE. HENCE, THE ROLE OF THE EXPERTS FROM MUSIC AND ART IS UNDENIEABLE. TO CONCLUDE, OWING TO MODERNIZATION, SCIENE AND TECHNOLOGY IS CONSIDERED VITAL IN THIS ERA. IN MY VIEW, THE ROLE OF EXPERTS FROM SCIENCE, TECHNOLOGY MUSIC AND ARTS MUST BE CONSIDERED EQUAL IN SOCIETY.
IN THIS CONTEMPORARY ERA, SCIENCE AND
TECHNOLOGY
ARE MORE VALUED THAN MUSIC AND
ART
. IN MY OPINION, EQUAL IMPORTANCE
MUST
BE
GIVEN
TO SPECIALISTS OF BOTH DOMAIN.

ADVANCEMENT IN AUTOMATION HAS PRODUCED COMFORT IN HUMAN LIFE.
HOWEVER
, INNOVATIVE
IDEAS
AND NEW EXPERIMENTS ARE
STILL
NEEDED IN THIS FIELD.
THEREFORE
, THIS
SPECIALITY
MUST
BE
HIGHLY
VALUED. AS AN ILLUSTRATION, OWING TO SCARCITY OF, IT
EXPERTS
IN PAKISTAN, FEW NATIONAL
EXPERTS
WERE OFFERED
HIGH INCOME TO REVOLUTIONIZE IT SECTOR.
IN ADDITION
, SCIENTISTS
DESRVE
RESPECT AND HIGH STATUS IN SOCIETY, AS THEY DEVOTE MAJOR PROPORTION OF THEIR LIFE TO THE BETTERMENT OF MANKIND.
FOR INSTANCE
, SCIENTISTS SPEND
MANY
MONTHS IN SPACE, LIVING APART FROM THEIR FAMILY TO EXPLORE AND TO ACQUIRE KNOWLEDGE SPACE TO GLORIFY AND TO CREATE
EASE
IN HUMAN POPULATION.
THEREFORE
, IT IS VITAL TO CONSIDER
PEOPLE
FROM SUCH AREAS,
IMPORTANT
.

ALTHOUGH MODERN SOCIETY WELCOME AND VALUE SPECIALISTS FROM SCIENCE AND
TECHNOLOGY
, THE
HARDWORK
OF MUSICIANS AND ARTISTS CAN NOT
BE DENIED
. AS THEY COMFORT HUMAN SOUL BY PRODUCING
POSITIVE
IMPACT ON SPIRITUAL LEVEL. TO ILLUSTRATE, STATISTICS
REVELEAD
, DUE TO THE PLEASING SOUND OF VARIOUS INSTRUMENTS, A MAJOR IMPROVEMENT WAS NOT IN PSYCHIATRIC PATIENTS.
FURTHERMORE
,
ART
CREATES
AWARNESS
AMONG MASSES AS IT IS THE EFFECTIVE WAY TO CONVEY YOUR MESSAGE THROUGH CREATIVITY.
IN OTHER WORDS
,
SHARMEEN
, A NOBLE PRIZE WINNER, FROM PAKISTAN, PORTRAYED THE
POSITIVE
IMAGE OF WOMEN AND HIGHLIGHTED THE
DOMISTIC
VIOLENCE ISSUE.
HENCE
, THE ROLE OF THE
EXPERTS
FROM MUSIC AND
ART
IS
UNDENIEABLE
.

TO CONCLUDE
, OWING TO MODERNIZATION,
SCIENE
AND
TECHNOLOGY
IS CONSIDERED
VITAL IN THIS ERA. IN MY VIEW, THE ROLE OF
EXPERTS
FROM SCIENCE,
TECHNOLOGY
MUSIC AND
ARTS
MUST
BE CONSIDERED
EQUAL IN SOCIETY.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay People often do not interact with their neighbours and this is harming community building what are the possible causes and solutions v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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